Demon Knights 3 (January 2012)

Previously, I thought I could at least rely on the art in Demon Knights to be good, but Neves and Albert are slipping. Too much detail here, too little there. Some of it appears positively disjointed–one page looks like George Perez and the final page (the super soft cliffhanger) looks rushed. I wonder if they had to do a less gory version at the last minute.

This issue is the cast under siege and Cornell finally starts to recognize his problems. Besides the Shining Knight, the Demon and Vandal Savage, the cast all blurs together. There’s even a joke about it in dialogue.

Unfortunately, just because Cornell recognizes it doesn’t mean he does anything to alleviate it. This issue of Demon Knights is probably the best–the Shining Knight gender jokes alone give it that status–but it’s still not any good.

Cornell’s apparent lack of enthusiasm sinks it.

CREDITS

First Sacrifices; writer, Paul Cornell; penciller, Diógenes Neves; inker, Oclair Albert; colorist, Marcelo Maiolo; letterer, Jared K. Fletcher; editors, Chris Conroy and Matt Idelson; publisher, DC Comics.

Stormwatch 3 (January 2012)

Seeing as how Cornell’s pacing of the comic is so obvious–he tries and fails to make it feel like a big action movie–it’s boring. The only compelling element is the appearance of the personification of the city of Gotham.

Guess what?

It’s a Bat-man.

But Cornell tries all these jokes and then the rousing action scene with Apollo saving the world… and none of Stormwatch works. For a while, I wondered if it was getting better because I could follow the action scenes.

Then I realized, no, it’s no better. I’m a little more used to it, but it’s still pretty bad.

Miguel Sepulveda’s art should be fine, but Cornell’s script includes so much dumb, non-visual material, Sepulveda stumbles. Cornell has Speulveda draw giant monsters from the human perspective; these things are too big to be scary or even threatening.

Stormwatch needs to check its scale.

CREDITS

The Dark Side, Part Three; writer, Paul Cornell; artist, Miguel Sepulveda; colorists, Alex Sinclair and Pete Pantazis; letterer, Rob Leigh; editors, Sean Mackiewicz and Pat McCallum; publisher, DC Comics.

Demon Knights 2 (December 2011)

A few pages into Demon Knights, right after the first long fight sequence ends (Cornell’s all about fantasy creature fight scenes in this one), I realized the series’s big problem. Obviously, it’s Cornell, but specifically… he’s not making fun of it. He’s writing these characters in the Dark Ages and he’s got them using modern English. He’s even got them using twenty-first century colloquialisms. I’m shocked there’s not a Twitter reference it’s all so painfully hip.

But he’s not telling a joke or something. It’s not like A Knight’s Tale or whatnot. Cornell’s presenting it like these characters really talk this way. And we’re supposed to take them (and him) seriously.

The Neves and Albert art is slick but good. Except when it’s just the Demon alone, then the slickness gets to be too much. Etrigan shouldn’t be slick.

Knights is a bad comic. It’s not getting any better….

CREDITS

They Shall Not Pass; writer, Paul Cornell; penciller, Diógenes Neves; inker, Oclair Albert; colorist, Marcelo Maiolo; letterer, Jared K. Fletcher; editors, Chris Conroy and Matt Idelson; publisher, DC Comics.

Stormwatch 2 (December 2011)

I was really hoping Stormwatch would get better. First, Paul Cornell seems like a nice guy and I’ve liked a couple of his comics before. Second, I didn’t want to suffer through another bad comic.

Too bad. Being hopeful made it all the worse.

Well, that statement isn’t exactly correct. Cornell gives a momentary suggestion it might get better then doesn’t follow through. It seems like there’s going to be some actual action in the comic, but instead Cornell introduces a subplot about strife among team members. It turns out no one in Stormwatch likes anyone else.

There’s some slight amusement at the implication the Justice League are a bunch of morons; Stormwatch has been brainwashing them.

Oh, right, I almost forgot… Cornell goes out of his way to remind everyone he’s British. It’s painfully obvious.

I don’t even want to think about how bad the next issue will be.

CREDITS

The Dark Side, Part Two; writer, Paul Cornell; penciller, Miguel Sepulveda; inker, Al Barrionuevo; colorist, Alex Sinclair; letterer, Rob Leigh; editors, Sean Mackiewicz and Pat McCallum; publisher, DC Comics.

Demon Knights 1 (November 2011)

You know, if Paul Cornell’s idea of high comedy is revealing Madame Xanadu has a thing for demons from hell… I’m not sure I want to see his low comedy.

If the first issue—and the large cast Cornell introduces—is any indication, Demon Knights is going to be a medieval team book with DC’s heroes of that era. Cornell goes crazy, having a girl pretend to be a boy so she can be a knight.

That detail is revolutionary… it’s not like it’s been a standard since the 1600s.

The first five pages are set in Camelot and I remembered Camelot 3000 and got all hopeful. Immediately out of Camelot, it veers towards the worse.

Cornell really likes cheap shocks. Besides Xanadu’s deceiving Jason Blood to keep the Demon around for sex and violence, Cornell tortures and kills a baby.

It’s contrived, boring, and painfully trying to be sensational.

CREDITS

Seven Against the Dark; writer, Paul Cornell; penciller, Diógenes Neves; inker, Oclair Albert; colorist, Marcelo Maiolo; letterer, Jared K. Fletcher; editors, Chris Conroy and Matt Idelson; publisher, DC Comics.

Stormwatch 1 (November 2011)

After reading Stormwatch, I’m only interested in two things.

First, why does Paul Cornell write Martian Manhunter so badly? I don’t think he’s supposed to be a tool, but he seems like one.

Second, are Apollo and Midnighter still gay? Or did Geoff, Jim and Dan retcon them straight?

Because nothing else in Stormwatch really matters to anyone who isn’t a big Stormwatch fan. Cornell seems to know he’s possibly introducing a bunch of characters to new readers—he fills the issue with expository dialogue—but there’s nothing to encourage any new readers to come back. His soft cliffhanger is Apollo and Midnighter meeting, which means nothing to a new reader.

A big plot reveal is an evil alien living in the moon. If Stormwatch is so cool, how come they didn’t notice over thousands of years?

It’s not bad, it’s just utterly pointless. And strangely “Marvel” in many ways.

CREDITS

The Dark Side, Part One; writer, Paul Cornell; artist, Miguel Sepulveda; colorist, Allen Passalaqua; letterer, Rob Leigh; editors, Sean Mackiewicz and Pat McCallum; publisher, DC Comics.

Black Widow: Deadly Origin (2010) #4

Black Widow Deadly Origin 4

What’s so amusingly sad about the final issue of Deadly Origin is Cornell’s pop psychology to explain the villain’s intentions. I think if Cornell had sat down and watched a bad episode of “Another World,” he would have come off with a deeper understanding of the human condition and how to apply it to the contrived plot he has going here. It’s really a dreadful finish.

But the worst part is all the John Paul Leon flashback art is in the first half of the issue. The rest of it is left to Raney and Hanna, who do the same bad job they’ve been doing the rest of the time. It’s a little worse, I suppose, since Raney’s got to render a SHIELD helicarrier stand-in… in space. It looks really stupid.

The Leon work at the beginning is just wonderful. Makes me wish he’d do a full Marvel series.

Black Widow: Deadly Origin (2010) #3

Black Widow Deadly Origin 3

So all of (well, most of) John Paul Leon’s flashback art this issue is when Black Widow was a superhero in the seventies and eighties. It’s all this fantastic, bright Marvel superhero art, only by Leon. It looks amazing. I wonder if he could sustain it or if just doing a few panels is the limit.

The rest of the issue is awful. I love how Raney can’t keep Natasha’s face centered on her head and his Bucky needs to be seen to be believed. Bucky looks like a teenager with some kind of glandular disorder.

Cornell’s writing is pretty hideous and his big reveal at the end is dumb. But I guess Jim McCann liked the twist a lot because he used it again, less than a year later, in Widowmaker.

Maybe if Cornell’s dialogue were good… but it’s not. Even the flashback dialogue reeks.

Just like the comic.

Black Widow: Deadly Origin (2010) #2

Black Widow Deadly Origin 2

I wish I knew who had the idea suggesting Black Widow and Mockingbird were lesbian lovers, Cornell or his editor… Because unless the next issue reveals Natasha’s only into guys for country and it’s girls for self, it’s the lamest writing move I’ve read since Jeph Loeb had a fifteen year-old girl make out with Poison Ivy to please debauched readers.

Besides that weak finish, this issue is mildly better than the first. It’s incredibly confusing and a bad story, but it’s better than the first issue. I guess Black Widow is now the Russian equivalent of Captain America only she didn’t go on cold storage.

Actually, the real reason this issue’s better is it seems like there’s more Leon, even if he’s just more spread out through the issue, and at least Leon’s competent. Raney and Milla’s renderings are hideous, whether Natasha or her supporting cast.

Origin stinks.

Black Widow: Deadly Origin (2010) #1

Black Widow Deadly Origin 1

I thought I liked Paul Cornell. I would have reexamine that affection, or I can just finish reading Deadly Origin and it’ll do it for me.

Apparently, Natasha’s really old. Like pre-WWII old. And she’s been artificially de-aged and she used to know Wolverine and Bucky when he was Winter Soldier for the Commies.

This might be the stupidest retcon I’ve ever read, but it’s hard to make that kind of final judgment because it’s so bewildering. What’s the point to making Natasha a WWII hero? What’s the point of the Wolverine tie-in? I thought Marvel had stopped tying everyone into Wolverine. Maybe sales dipped again.

The real monstrosity is the art. Regardless how stupid the plot, Tom Raney and Scott Hanna’s art is infinitely worse. They draw Natasha like she’s a teenager (with eighties hair).

John Paul Leon’s fill-in pages are better, but not great.