Black Orchid 4 (December 1993)

3505 This issue, with all its magic, ought to work. It’s about water nymphs and forest spirits and all sorts of earth magic and it just doesn’t work. The problem is Foreman and Thompson are too literal. Thompson even paints a full page but it doesn’t help.

Foreman opens with his dumb freelance reporter from the first issue, who doesn’t do anything but bookend the story. Then Sherilyn, the hooker with the heart of gold, considers leaving Black Orchid–who’s passed out most of the issue–and go back to the real world.

Throw in a rich Greek expat with a mansion in Tennessee and a sad flashback about his romance with a water nymph and there’s nothing else to the comic. Foreman’s coy about resolving the previous series; he’s also slacking on developing Black Orchid as a character.

Thompson’s handling of the lengthy flashback is charmless.

Orchid continues to underwhelm.

CREDITS

Acts of Faith; writer, Dick Foreman; penciller, Jill Thompson; inker, Stan Woch; colorists, George Freeman and Digital Chameleon; letterer, Clem Robins; editors, Julie Rottenberg and Lou Stathis; publisher, Vertigo.

Black Orchid 3 (November 1993)

3504 Bill and Ted guest star this issue. Thankfully, Foreman only gives them a few pages. Reading his dialogue for stoners, one might guess Foreman has never gotten stoned, much less tripped.

But besides them–and the lame narration from Black Orchid’s call girl friend–it’s the best issue so far. It’s not good, as Foreman comes up with a crisis then resolves it without explaining the crisis or the resolution, but it’s better than what he was doing before.

Oddly, it’s the worst issue for the art. Thompson is a boring action artist and the setting–a forest of fungus–isn’t the most interesting in her style either. She never gets trippy, which might have helped. It’s just a lot of Black Orchid and Sherilyn (the hooker) walking around.

Foreman also hasn’t done much to define Orchid, except as a liar and manipulator. Still, the hooker isn’t likable either.

Eh.

CREDITS

The Tainted Zone; writer, Dick Foreman; penciller, Jill Thompson; inker, Stan Woch; colorist, Digital Chameleon; letterer, Clem Robins; editors, Julie Rottenberg and Lou Stathis; publisher, Vertigo.

Swamp Thing 159 (October 1995)

16129 Jill Thompson does fill-in for Millar’s attack on, let’s see, both the English upperclass and on Scottish parents.

It involves an elite dining club; the members have to eat whatever is put on their plate to keep in good standing. Can’t really spoil the big surprise, since Millar does a whole bait and switch for seven pages to hide it, but the salad course is an old Swamp Thing head.

Even though it’s horrifying, it’s a lovely little story about a boy and his dog–Millar dedicates it to a past pooch. It also gives him a chance to show off outside the comic’s regular constraints. He gets to be weird and funny but still show some heart without figuring out how to make it tie majorly into Swamp Thing.

Thompson’s art is fine. There’s nothing particularly good about it; the regular artists would’ve handled things just as well.

CREDITS

Swamp Dog; writer, Mark Millar; artist, Jill Thompson; colorist, Tatjana Wood; letterer, Richard Starkings; editor, Stuart Moore; publisher, Vertigo.

Black Orchid 2 (October 1993)

3503 If so inclined, one could admire Foreman’s commitment with the second issue. He takes everything bad about the first issue and enhances it. Except maybe the bad narrator.

Instead, he has a bunch of villainous military industrial guys who talk a lot. No pop culture reference, which is both a surprise and maybe Foreman’s best move as a writer, but their dialogue is awful. And there’s lots of it.

There’s also a strange sequence where Black Orchid’s working girl friend is identified on the street as a working girl by some toughs. Only she’s not wearing anything provocative; it’s like Thompson refused to play into Foreman’s weak plot choice.

Black Orchid’s presence brings the comic’s only pulse. Thompson and Woch draw her better than anyone else and the mystical realism aspect is neat. Foreman doesn’t go for that angle, however; he’s committed to doing a realistic superhero comic.

He’s not.

CREDITS

Black Orchid; writer, Dick Foreman; penciller, Jill Thompson; inker, Stan Woch; colorist, Digital Chameleon; letterer, Clem Robins; editors, Julie Rottenberg, Tom Peyer and Lou Stathis; publisher, Vertigo.

Black Orchid 1 (September 1993)

3502 Weird comic. Especially for a first issue. Dick Foreman’s narrative choices don’t help it much either. He makes Black Orchid the subject of the issue, not a player. She’s an urban legend and so on; Foreman’s got a lame investigative reporter narrating and trying to find her.

There’s a lot about how great it is to drink coffee in the narration. Probably two or three hundred words. It’s sort of uncomfortable to read, it feels so amateurish and I’ve liked Foreman’s writing before.

The Jill Thompson pencils (with Stan Woch inking) are cool, but they don’t really make the issue worth it until the finish. When Black Orchid finally does have a scene, Thompson and Woch do wonders. Before her arrival, it’s just an interesting looking comic. The style’s not quite mainstream, but going for it.

For a first issue of an ongoing series, Foreman fumbles big time. Big time.

CREDITS

Sightings; writer, Dick Foreman; penciller, Jill Thompson; inker, Stan Woch; colorist, Digital Chameleon; letterer, Clem Robins; editors, Julie Rottenberg and Tom Peyer; publisher, Vertigo.

Black Orchid 5 (January 1994)

3506 Oh, good grief. This issue ties in to Swamp Thing, with Black Orchid and Sherilyn the hooker with a heart of gold heading to Louisiana. Black Orchid, it turns out, is a Swamp Thing expert and thinks she can help him through his relationship troubles.

Foreman doesn’t even try to explain how Black Orchid knows so much about Swampy. Maybe she’s been reading the comics.

But until the lame walk through the swamp mind of Swamp Thing (he’s physically creating his thoughts out of plants), Foreman has Sherilyn narrating the issue. Except, however, when he opens it with his idiotic reporter guy.

The reporter falls victim to a laughing fit; a Joker cameo, unfortunately, does not materialize.

Thompson and Woch do okay in the swamp, but all the human scenes–Foreman centers on Sherilyn–are rather rough going. The artists being bored with the writing is never a good sign.

CREDITS

The Mind Fields, Part One; writer, Dick Foreman; pencillers, Jill Thompson and Rebecca Guay; inker, Stan Woch; colorists, George Freeman and Digital Chameleon; letterer, Clem Robins; editors, Julie Rottenberg and Lou Stathis; publisher, Vertigo.

Girl Comics (2010) #2

Girl comics 2

It’s another terrible issue. Is Marvel trying to say all female creators can do are trite stories? Colleen Coover annoys with her opening…

Oh, wait. The Jill Thompson Inhumans story is fine. It’s predictable to the point I think I’ve read it somewhere before (Lockjaw getting a bath) but the art’s good and the writing’s inoffensive.

The next one is awful—it’s about a superheroine beauty parlor, from Coover with Kathryn Immonem writing. The uncredited letterer screws up the dialogue pacing but it wouldn’t be much better with competent word balloons.

Stephanie Buscema has a weak Doctor Doom two pager.

Faith Erin Hicks’s Nextwave story features a superhero killing teenagers. I guess that’s cool. You know, for a Disney comic. But it’s otherwise weak.

Abby Denson and Emma Vieceli’s superhero personals (starring Mary Jane) is lame.

Finally, Christine Boylan and Cynthia Martin’s Doctor Strange is well-illustrated but poorly written.

Superman / Batman (2003) #75

Sb75

Levitz wraps up the arc with a Legion of Super-Heroes story guest starring Batman. Superman’s in a panel or two. Lex’s planet has paid-off (in the future), with a Kryptonite-infused Lex clone going through history after Superman (and Superboy).

The story’s unpredictable and funny. And Ordway’s mostly just drawing, not trying to look painted, so the art’s much better.

The rest of the issue is two-page anniversary stories.

Seagle and Kristiansen’s is pointless self-indulgence. Tucci’s actually funny. Hughes does a poster; great art, of course. The big surprise is the Krul one (with Manapul on the art). The writing’s actually funny. Thompson’s got a couple pinups. Green and Johnson (art by Davis and Albuquerque) are unmemorable.

Rouleau’s got a fantastic one, so do Azzarello and Bermejo.

Finch and Williams’s one is atrociously written.

Tomasi and Ha’s entry is pointless but looks nice.

Excellent feature though.

Beasts of Burden (2009) #4

Bb4

Compared to the previous three issues, the series ends on a weak note. It’s still awesome and all, but it’s a kinda cliffhanger and kinda cliffhangers are damned annoying when it comes to limited series. The letters column even opens with talk about another series, instead of giving this one any kind of closure. In fact, it raises even more issues, with the ostensible team leader (Ace) showing a murderous streak (he, possessed, helped kill the young Republican in issue two).

It’s a dark issue, with the Burden Hill Beasts (their team name, which I missed completely–it’s never used in the actual issues) fighting a resurrected human. It ties into the second issue and the third issue, not just their mysteries but also picking up the thread of the kitties in love from issue three, only from the disapproving canine perspective.

Great stuff; just wish it was an ongoing.

Beasts of Burden (2009) #3

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As a rat owner, I’m horrified Dorkin uses them as these master villains, the animal kingdom’s equivalent of Al Queda or something; however, as a reader, I have to admit, it’s a darn good book–though I’m not sure I like getting done with it without the mystery being solved.

This issue’s a romance issue, at least it turns into one and it’s a fine romance issue. The issue starts like a–well, it feels almost like Tom Sawyer, just because it’s all these distinct characters in a suburban setting, but it’s also a lot like Lady and the Tramp (for the same reason)–it ends like an old detective movie, with the happy couple in the moonlight.

Dorkin and Thompson should be very proud of themselves (and Dark Horse should be paying them very well); this series is easily the best thing I’ve read from Dark Horse in years.