Category: 2011

Charles, Your Hangover (2011, Two Trick Pony)

So, according to Charles, Your Hangover, hangovers don’t have to do with brain chemistry and blood alcohol content, but an annoying Adam Scott-wannabe played by Tory Stanton.

Charles is really well-made. The director (or directors), Two Trick Pony, do an outstanding job with Panavision aspect ratio and Joel Pincosy’s photography is fantastic. It’s just not funny.

Scott McCabe plays the lead character, the one with the hangover, and he isn’t appealing. Once he sobers up a bit–and gets away from Stanton–McCabe is a little better. But he never makes a real impression.

The short is all about its gimmick and its gimmick isn’t original. It feels like an audition for a commercial (the similarities between it and those Dean Winters Allstate insurance commercials is palpable). So all Charles has going for it is the filmmaking and the filmmaking’s good.

It just doesn’t produce an amusing film.

1/3Not Recommended

CREDITS

Written, directed and produced by Two Trick Pony; director of photography, Joel Pincosy; edited by Zephyr Muntari; music by Thomas VanOosting.

Starring Tory Stanton (Charles), Scott McCabe (Martin), Jai Sahai (Roommate), Elizabeth Aaron (Denise) and Jon Nagel (Boss).

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Green Lantern (2011, Martin Campbell), the extended cut

The saddest thing about Green Lantern has to be the editing. Stuart Baird, amazing action editor of the last twenty or so years, cut together this malarky. It’s not Baird’s fault, exactly, how ugly Lantern plays—cinematographer Dion Beebe’s responsible for the shots not matching in lighting and Campbell composed them. But Baird’s always had a grace about his cutting. None of it is present here.

Or maybe James Newton Howard’s godawful score distracts from it.

The problem is Campbell and not because he can’t somehow make the shoddy CG work (though the fighter jets look okay… not real, but better than the space stuff). He isn’t directing his actors. If Campbell’s not taking the time to try to turn the crappy script into something good, why should anyone bother to see what he does with it….

I’m not talking about Ryan Reynolds. He’s terrible, sure, but there are a lot worse performances here. Blake Lively is atrocious, so is Mark Strong. Well, he’s more laughable than atrocious. Gattlin Griffith, as a young Reynolds, is hilariously bad.

More shocking than Reynolds is Campbell getting a phoned-in performance from Tim Robbins. I’ve never seen Robbins waste his time like he does here. Even Jay O. Sanders is bad, in what should be an easy role.

There’s no way Green Lantern would have been good with this script, but it could have been better. I hate blaming Campbell, who’s done excellent work; he should’ve taken an Alan Smithee on this garbage.

Bridesmaids (2011, Paul Feig), the unrated version

Whatever its faults, Bridesmaids‘s filmmakers get credit for making Maya Rudolph’s parents black and white, instead of ignoring her racial background like many other films would. Sadly, being better in that regard does not make up for Rudolph’s performance being the film’s worst or her character being dreadfully underwritten.

Writers Annie Mumolo and Kristen Wiig, for the wedding and lead in to the wedding, borrow from a lot of popular movies (some even from producer Judd Apatow’s oeuvre). It’s sometimes successful, but in the end, it’s trite.

Luckily, Wiig did not just cowrite Bridesmaids, she starred in it. Her performance is fantastic, as is her story arc. Removing the wedding stuff with Rudolph might get rid of Bridesmaids‘s MacGuffin, but it would have produced a far better film.

Bridesmaids suffers from too much funny business. The filmmakers eject multiple subplots to concentrate on Wiig and her problems. There’s her romance with genial cop Chris O’Dowd, her sex-only relationship with an uncredited Jon Hamm (who’s hilarious) and her life just generally being in a bad place.

From the start, Mumolo and Wiig never ground Bridesmaids in a believable reality. They seem to think setting it in Milwaukee will do the trick alone–and it does some of the heavy lifting–but Wiig’s life is cartoonish. Unfortunately, the script often relies on being absurd instead of sincere.

Great supporting turns from Rose Byrne and Melissa McCarthy help, especially during weaker sequences.

Feig’s direction is affably indistinct.

Wiig’s performance is, again, fantastic.

2/4★★

CREDITS

Directed by Paul Feig; written by Kristen Wiig and Annie Mumolo; director of photography, Robert D. Yeomen; edited by William Kerr and Michael L. Sale; music by Michael Andrews; production designer, Jefferson Sage; produced by Judd Apatow, Barry Mendel and Clayton Townsend; released by Universal Pictures.

Starring Kristen Wiig (Annie Walker), Maya Rudolph (Lillian Donovan), Rose Byrne (Helen Harris III), Melissa McCarthy (Megan), Wendi McLendon-Covey (Rita), Ellie Kemper (Becca), Chris O’Dowd (Officer Nathan Rhodes), Jill Clayburgh (Ms. Walker), Franklyn Ajaye (Mr. Donovan), Jon Hamm (Ted), Matt Lucas (Gil) and Rebel Wilson (Brynn).

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X-Men: First Class (2011, Matthew Vaughn)

When the best thing in a 132-minute movie is a thirty-second cameo… it’s not a good sign.

X-Men: First Class is self-important dreck. The four credited screenwriters do a bad job with everything except the one-liners; they do some of those quite well.

There are a lot of goofy sixties details. Bad guy Kevin Bacon has a submarine he travels around in like a Bond villain, but Vaughn doesn’t know how to direct it like a flashy Technicolor picture. His direction’s adequate, nothing more.

Except his direction of actors. It’s terrible. Zoë Kravitz, January Jones, Caleb Landry Jones and Lucas Till are all atrocious, though their roles are small. Well, except January Jones, she’s exceptionally bad in her somewhat larger part.

But Jennifer Lawrence has a big role and, while she’s not as bad as the rest, she’s too weak to carry it. Nicholas Hoult is pretty good.

Still, the acting’s not all bad. Bacon’s having a great time. The two leads are mostly good. Michael Fassbender gives a great performance for a lot of the film, but then awkwardly adopts a Welsh accent in the last few scenes. James McAvoy’s sturdy, but never anything more.

Poor Rose Byrne (a mildly competent screenwriter would’ve known to tell the story from her perspective) is wasted.

The endless character actor stunt casting gets old fast, though it’s nice to see them working.

Henry Jackman’s music might be worse than anything else in First Class. Even January Jones.

Orc Stain (2010) #6

Os6

Funny how Stokoe can have the present action of an issue be fifteen minutes and I can’t imagine anyone would ever think of calling him decompressed or lazy. Maybe because he does the art (and colors and letters) too and the art in this speedy issue is probably more complex than the longer paced ones.

One-Eye is busy escaping from the giant monster mountain, along with a couple impromptu sidekicks, on the run from some cannibal orcs and the living walls. So it’s an extended chase through an organic system. Very gross. Stokoe excels at it.

But the witch is still hanging out and the big villain is around too. Stokoe brings them all together for the cliffhanger, which also reveals some of One-Eye’s origin, but only if you pay close attention. Not because the story’s complicated, but because Stokoe’s art is so detailed.

It’s another awesome Stain.

Limitless (2011, Neil Burger)

I never thought I’d see a movie where Bradley Cooper gives a far better performance than Robert De Niro. Not to say Cooper’s good in Limitless—the film is mildly amusing, sort of an amped up episode of “House,” mixed with Love Potion No. 9 and Flowers for Algernon, but Cooper’s still a lot better than De Niro.

Leslie Dixon’s script has a lot of strong points (one wonders if the weaker details are from the source novel). If Limitless were a little smarter, working to alienate instead of embrace, it would be even better. The real problem—besides De Niro being awful and Cooper being weak—is director Burger. He has two modes. One is bad handheld digital video and the other is bad, digitally enhanced digital video. It’s horrific at times.

Oh, wait, I forgot the photography—when Cooper’s got his super mental powers (which include his eyes getting bluer)—is important. It’s high contrast when Cooper’s in super-mode. Actually, I suppose Jo Willems’s photography is good, doing what Burger asks of it. It’s just a stupid request.

Abbie Cornish is weak as Cooper’s love interest, as is Andrew Howard as his nemesis. Anna Friel barely has any lines but she’s decent; Tomas Arana has none and he gives the film’s best performance.

One of the funnier problems is how Cooper’s a handsome guy made scuzzy for when he’s dumb. If they’d reversed it, it would’ve been much better.

But lots of changes would’ve made it better.

0/4ⓏⒺⓇⓄ

CREDITS

Directed by Neil Burger; screenplay by Leslie Dixon, based on a novel by Alan Glynn; director of photography, Jo Willems; edited by Tracy Adams and Naomi Geraghty; music by Paul Leonard-Morgan; production designer, Patrizia von Brandenstein; produced by Dixon, Ryan Kavanaugh and Scott Kroopf; released by Relativity Media.

Starring Bradley Cooper (Eddie Morra), Robert De Niro (Carl Van Loon), Abbie Cornish (Lindy), Andrew Howard (Gennady), Anna Friel (Melissa), Johnny Whitworth (Vernon), Tomas Arana (Man in Tan Coat), Robert John Burke (Pierce), Darren Goldstein (Kevin Doyle), Ned Eisenberg (Morris Brandt), T.V. Carpio (Valerie), Richard Bekins (Hank Atwood) and Patricia Kalember (Mrs. Atwood).

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Superman Classic (2011, Robb Pratt)

While it only runs a minute (I think), Superman Classic–which director Pratt describes as a “super fan film”–is pretty, well, super. Only the final moment disappoints, mostly because it’s a promise Pratt’s not going to keep.

Classic is mostly hand drawn animation, which gives the cartoon the “fan film” feel occasionally, but Pratt professionally packages it. The music is from the old serials and sets a certain tone. But the backgrounds remind of the Fleischer cartoons. And Pratt gives Clark Kent mannerisms straight out of Christopher Reeve’s essaying of the character.

Not to mention John Newton (who once played Superboy on TV) voices Superman.

Classic feels like a thoughtful, warm homage to the various Superman moving pictures.

The first moments, between Clark and Lois are the best. In a few lines, Pratt establishes the classic banter with some modern details.

I wish Classic were just twenty seconds longer….

2/3Recommended

CREDITS

Produced and directed by Robb Pratt; screenplay by Pratt, based on characters created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster; animated by Pratt, Steven Pierre Gordon and James Baker.

Starring John Newton (Clark Kent / Superman) and Jennifer Newton (Lois Lane).

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Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol (2011, Brad Bird)

Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol might be a vanity project for producer-star Tom Cruise, but he sort of deserves it. His first scene features some athletics from him–the film’s full of them–and it’s hard to believe Cruise is nearly fifty. Either he’s got a portrait locked in a closet, they CG’ed his body or vitamins really are magic….

Ghost Protocol, silly title and all, is a fairly diverting espionage action thriller. With Michael Giacchino’s lush score, lots of gadgets and lots of globe trotting, it feels like a James Bond movie. Just an American one with an emphasis on teamwork.

For his first live action film, director Bird does an outstanding job. The film’s problems progressively get more outlandish, but he keeps them in check. Ghost Protocol is a comedy of errors. Nothing goes right; Bird keeps it moving fast enough one doesn’t think too hard.

And Ghost Protocol opens with silly opening titles showcasing later scenes in the movie. If Bird can recover from that lunacy, he can do almost anything.

His composition is strong–he fills the Panavision frame stylishly. It’s a great looking film, except when the CG composites don’t quite match.

Cruise is sturdy in the lead, but has nothing to do. He’s mostly just shepherding the team–Pegg’s blandly amusing and Jeremy Renner’s fine. The film’s best performance is easily from Paula Patton.

As the villain, Michael Nyqvist is terrible.

The conclusion’s just a setup for a reinvigorated franchise… likely an entertaining one.

1.5/4★½

CREDITS

Directed by Brad Bird; screenplay by Josh Appelbaum and André Nemec, based on the television series created by Bruce Geller; director of photography, Robert Elswit; edited by Paul Hirsch; music by Michael Giacchino; production designer, James D. Bissell; produced by J.J. Abrams, Tom Cruise and Bryan Burk; released by Paramount Pictures.

Starring Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Paula Patton (Jane Carter), Simon Pegg (Benji Dunn), Jeremy Renner (William Brandt), Michael Nyqvist (Kurt Hendricks), Vladimir Mashkov (Anatoly Sidorov), Samuli Edelmann (Wistrom), Ivan Shvedoff (Leonid Lisenker), Anil Kapoor (Brij Nath), Léa Seydoux (Sabine Moreau), Josh Holloway (Trevor Hanaway), Pavel Kríz (Marek Stefanski) and Miraj Grbic (Bogdan).

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The Gate (2011, Matt Westrup)

The Gate opens quietly on Tryphena Russel. The first few minutes of the short, director Westrup just holds on her. She’s witnessed some strange happening and the police are interviewing her. Her performance, and the finely intercut flashback snippets, are the short’s hook.

Westrup then cuts to John Mawson, who’s one of those British scientists everyone wants to listen to and believe. The rest of the short is Mawson talking over the further outbreaks with a government committee. Westrup’s wide composition is precise. He very carefully constructs the briefing scenes. While there’s a lot more visually impressive stuff in the flashbacks, the meeting scenes are the best thing in the short. Westrup and his editor, Nikki Porter, do outstanding work.

The other scenes have some great visual effects–though Porter’s editing remains essential. But even they are more engaging because of their unexpected turns.

The Gate‘s a beautifully executed film.

3/3Highly Recommended

CREDITS

Written and directed by Matt Westrup; directors of photography, Peter Ellmore and Jonas Mortensen; edited by Nikki Porter; produced by Spencer Friend.

Starring John Mawson (Dr. William Ackerman), Robert Rowe (Under Secretary Johnson) and Tryphena Russel (Female Witness).

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Stitched (2011, Garth Ennis)

Stitched has long end credits. Like two and a half or three minutes. On a seventeen minute short, one suspects they’re supposed to pad it out to respectable length.

Too bad the long end credits don’t make up for the bad acting and weak photography.

It opens well enough–director Ennis is a comic book writer and usually a very good one–and Stitched is fine until the actors open their mouths. Of the six cast members, only Larry ‘Tank’ Jones isn’t bad. Lauren Alonzo and Kate Kugler are awful.

The short lacks any tension. Ennis is always introducing visual elements the characters would already be seeing. A desert setting for a horror short about mummified zombies (or something) seems like a good idea.

But no. Ennis is way too constricted.

Still, it wouldn’t matter if his composition was better; Adam Goldfine, his cinematographer, is incompetent.

Stitched is a chore.

1/3Not Recommended

CREDITS

Written and directed by Garth Ennis; director of photography, Adam Goldfine; edited by Brian Pulido; music by Jim Casella; production designer, Francisca Pulido; produced by Brian Pulido, Francisca Pulido and Ed Polgardy; released by Avatar Press.

Starring Larry ‘Tank’ Jones (Pruitt), Lauren Alonzo (Cooper), Kate Kugler (Twiggy), Andrew DeCarlo (Barclay), Kevin Tye (Dave) and Carlo LaTempa (Baz).

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