Stitched has long end credits. Like two and a half or three minutes. On a seventeen minute short, one suspects they’re supposed to pad it out to respectable length.

Too bad the long end credits don’t make up for the bad acting and weak photography.

It opens well enough–director Ennis is a comic book writer and usually a very good one–and Stitched is fine until the actors open their mouths. Of the six cast members, only Larry ‘Tank’ Jones isn’t bad. Lauren Alonzo and Kate Kugler are awful.

The short lacks any tension. Ennis is always introducing visual elements the characters would already be seeing. A desert setting for a horror short about mummified zombies (or something) seems like a good idea.

But no. Ennis is way too constricted.

Still, it wouldn’t matter if his composition was better; Adam Goldfine, his cinematographer, is incompetent.

Stitched is a chore.

Not Recommended

CREDITS

Written and directed by Garth Ennis; director of photography, Adam Goldfine; edited by Brian Pulido; music by Jim Casella; production designer, Francisca Pulido; produced by Brian Pulido, Francisca Pulido and Ed Polgardy; released by Avatar Press.

Starring Larry ‘Tank’ Jones (Pruitt), Lauren Alonzo (Cooper), Kate Kugler (Twiggy), Andrew DeCarlo (Barclay), Kevin Tye (Dave) and Carlo LaTempa (Baz).