Dark Horse Presents 100 0 (July 1995)

This teaser for Dark Horse Presents 100 has some great stuff in it… but it also has some unbearably long entries.

Chadwick’s Concrete—though it’s always fun to read Concrete assuming the worst about humanity—goes on forever and turns out to be a prologue. It’s a little lame, though Chadwick’s art is decent.

LaBan’s Emo and Plum is relatively painless. It’s short, anyway. However Musgrove’s Fat Dog Mendoza is awful.

Paul Pope’s got a couple pages and it’s lovely (kind of an interactive discussion of Picasso). Some great figure work.

Brubaker and McEown tease their entry in 100, as does French. The Brubaker and McEown one seems a lot more compelling, with Brubaker’s writing strong even in the one page.

Then Mignola has an endless three page preview for his Hellboy story. It’s got a lot of expositional dialogue.

Still, this teaser’s better than many of the regular issues.

CREDITS

Eno and Plum; story, art and lettering by Terry LaBan. Concrete, The Artistic Impulse (excerpt); story, art and lettering by Paul Chadwick. Fat Dog Mendoza, The Secret Life of Leftovers (excerpt); story, art and lettering by Scott Musgrove. Pistacho!!; story, art and lettering by Paul Pope. Bird Dog (excerpt); story by Ed Brubaker; art by Pat McEwon. The Ninth Gland (excerpt); story, art and lettering by Renée French. Hellboy, The Chained Coffin (excerpt); story and art by Mike Mignola. Edited by Scott Allie and Bob Schreck.

Dark Horse Presents (1986) #91

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You know, Mignola doing a fight scene isn’t particular impressive. In fact, Hellboy had a fairly boring finish. Mignola tries to maintain the minimalist tone for the fight and so the fight is lame. There isn’t even any resolution to the story itself. It’s just Hellboy versus a big werewolf, who may or may not turn into leaves when he dies. It’s a weak finish… somewhat harmless, but weak.

Baden has its conclusion too. It’s McCallum’s best art on the story, some really nice panels. Too bad Alexander’s script is confusing and dumb. I think it turns out the whole thing is meaningless, but maybe not. Unfortunately, the final panel threatens of a sequel.

Then there’s Blackheart. I knew Quitely had some art in this issue but I forgot and read the story thinking about the great art. It’s some lovely work. Morrison’s script’s mediocre at best–way too overdone.

Dark Horse Presents (1986) #90

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Mignola looks good in black and white. There are some very effective panels in Hellboy. The writing helps. He knows when to write and when to just let the art do its work. Up until the end of this issue, it’s almost like Hellboy is a passive force in the story. He’s an unknown quantity. Then he starts kicking butt at the end. Oh, and horrifying werewolf transformation sequence. It’s short, but amazing.

As for Paleolove, the only thing Davis is worse at writing than narration is apparently scenes between two men. It’s hard to believe these cavemen could even follow what the other is saying since Davis seems to think dialogue is better the more confusing it gets. I wonder what Paleolove would be like if Davis could write or draw well.

Finally, there’s another Baden. Lots of technobabble. McCallum’s art is still fine, Alexander’s writing is still bad.

Dark Horse Presents (1986) #89

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This issue features something I never wanted to see… a Paleolove pin-up from Davis. You can tear it out and put bad art up on your wall.

His artwork is really weak for the first half, maybe his worst ever. It gets a little better for the second half of the boring installment. The writing is absolutely awful (Davis goes on and on about the “manly arts” here—basically hunting). He brings in another old character, but at least gives this one something to do.

The Hellboy story is good. It’s amazing how Mignola can make them spooky but generally mainstream. Hellboy’s barely in this installment, most of it has to do with the mystery, but his sidekick gets more page time it seems.

Alexander and McCallum’s Baden is some stupid sci-fi story about a riot cyborg or something. McCallum’s art isn’t bad but Alexander’s script is atrocious.

Dark Horse Presents 91 (November 1994)

CREDITS

Hellboy, The Wolves of Saint August, Part Four; story and art by Mike Mignola; lettering by Pat Brosseau; edited by Barbara Kesel. Baden, Part Three; story by Jim Alexander; art by Rob McCallum; lettering by Clem Robins. Blackheart, Part One; story by Robbie Morrison; art by Frank Quitely; lettering by Robbins. Edited by Bob Schreck and Edward Martin III.

Dark Horse Presents (1986) #88

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Is this issue the first appearance of Hellboy? I think it might be my first full Hellboy (not B.P.R.D.) story. It’s good, but Mignola does something weird with the conclusion. He sets the whole thing up, then has Hellboy come in and reveal it all before the first installment’s done. Makes all the setup a little unnecessary.

Then Lang and Lieber have another of their charming Nanny Katie stories. In this one, she’s revealed to be—at least I assume—an immortal storytelling nanny. It’s a gentle story about an old man waiting for his sons to arrive at his deathbed. Nice art from Lieber—there’s a lot of work on some of these panels, lots of mood.

So after two strong stories, how does it end? Paleolove.

Davis is inexplicably tying together some of his Paleolove storylines here. It’s pointless and trying—even weaker art than usual here too.

Dark Horse Presents 90 (October 1994)

Finally, there’s another Baden. Lots of technobabble. McCallum’s art is still fine, Alexander’s writing is still bad.

CREDITS

Hellboy, The Wolves of Saint August, Part Three; story and art by Mike Mignola; lettering by Pat Brosseau; edited by Barbara Kesel. Paleolove, Part Three; story, art and lettering by Gary Davis. Baden, Part Two; story by Jim Alexander; art by Rob McCallum; lettering by Clem Robins. Edited by Bob Schreck and Edward Martin III.

Dark Horse Presents 89 (September 1994)

This issue features something I never wanted to see… a Paleolove pin-up from Davis. You can tear it out and put bad art up on your wall.

Alexander and McCallum’s Baden is some stupid sci-fi story about a riot cyborg or something. McCallum’s art isn’t bad but Alexander’s script is atrocious.

CREDITS

Hellboy, The Wolves of Saint August, Part Two; story and art by Mike Mignola; lettering by Pat Brosseau; edited by Barbara Kesel. Paleolove, Part Two; story, art and lettering by Gary Davis. Baden, Part One; story by Jim Alexander; art by Rob McCallum; lettering by Clem Robins. Edited by Bob Schreck and Edward Martin III.

Dark Horse Presents 88 (August 1994)

So after two strong stories, how does it end? Paleolove.

Davis is inexplicably tying together some of his Paleolove storylines here. It’s pointless and trying—even weaker art than usual here too.

CREDITS

Hellboy, The Wolves of Saint August, Part One; story and art by Mike Mignola; lettering by Pat Brosseau; edited by Barbara Kesel. Nanny Katie, Sir John’s Passing; story by Jeffrey Lang; art by Steve Lieber. Paleolove, Part One; story, art and lettering by Gary Davis. Edited by Bob Schreck and Edward Martin III.

B.P.R.D.: 1947 (2009) #5

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Ok, so the whole thing was all about the Professor paying more attention to Hellboy? I mean, obviously, it can’t have been, what with little Hellboy only appearing in four of the five issues… oh, wait.

The final issue features an utterly useless battle between a priest and the two vampires who messed up the Professor’s agent. Except the vampires were, near as I could tell from them being staked to the wall, dead as of last issue. But now they’re not vampires, they’re demons.

Why are they demons? So the priest can imply the Professor should kill little Hellboy and the Professor can instead show him love (instead of ignoring him).

It’s a disastrous series.

Didn’t anyone sit down and read the scripts and, after being done reading in three minutes, think they should do something else? Work on them some more perhaps?

There’s nothing here but wasted time.