Flashdance (1983, Adrian Lyne)

Even though it’s terrible, Flashdance at least sticks with protagonist Jennifer Beals for most of the film. She’s a steel worker who dances at a club and starts dating her boss (at the steel mill, not the club, which is actually a bar). For a while, director Lyne and screenwriters Thomas Hedley Jr. and Joe Eszterhas try really hard to create the atmosphere of camaraderie at the bar.

All of the supporting cast has a story, especially Sunny Johnson, who dates the cook (Kyle T. Heffner, who wants to be a stand-up comic). She dreams of being an professional ice skater. But gives it up.

The film’s actually more of a character study than anything else. Just a bad one with a lot of pop music and Giorgio Moroder music playing over montages of Beals dancing sweatily (or her dance double dancing sweatily). When it’s actually just Beals working out, even if it’s scantily clad, Lyne feels the need to immediately follow with a break dancing montage of street performers.

I guess if it’s called Flashdance, there needs to be a lot of dancing.

There’s some more terrible stuff–a supporting cast member dies from an acute case of deus ex machina–but Beals is the protagonist. And then all of a sudden the film takes away her most important moment and makes her just a girlfriend character. It’s really upsetting, because Beals is at least likable, even if the movie’s crap.

The final disappointment is just too much.

0/4 ⓏⒺⓇⓄ

CREDITS

Directed by Adrian Lyne; screenplay by Thomas Hedley Jr. and Joe Eszterhas, based on a story by Hedley; director of photography, Donald Peterman; edited by Bud S. Smith and Walt Mulconery; music by Giorgio Moroder; production designer, Charles Rosen; produced by Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer; released by Paramount Pictures.

Starring Jennifer Beals (Alex Owens), Michael Nouri (Nick Hurley), Lilia Skala (Hanna Long), Sunny Johnson (Jeanie Szabo), Kyle T. Heffner (Richie), Lee Ving (Johnny C.) and Ron Karabatsos (Jake Mawby).


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OTHER 1983 RELEASES

Wasteland (1987) #9

For lack of a better word, this issue is dippy. It’s not particularly bad–nowhere near Wasteland‘s worst–but it’s definitely dippy.

As usual, the fault tends to lie with the writers. The first story is a Close autobiographical, again scripted by Ostrander. In it, Close goes to L. Ron Hubbard for therapy. The beautiful David Lloyd art–until a way too long fencing match–makes it palatable. It’s lame.

The second story (Ostrander writing solo) is about a guy in the ghetto challenging God to a street fight; it seems a tad racist. I’m sure it’s not, but it’s not in that guilty white liberal “not racist” way. The Simpson art, however, is an absolute joy.

The final story, another one starring Close (co-scripting with Ostrander), is another flop. Messner-Loebs, usually great on art, fumbles here. Without good art, it’s inane filler.

Just like the issue itself.

Wasteland 9 (August 1988)

For lack of a better word, this issue is dippy. It’s not particularly bad–nowhere near Wasteland‘s worst–but it’s definitely dippy.

The final story, another one starring Close (co-scripting with Ostrander), is another flop. Messner-Loebs, usually great on art, fumbles here. Without good art, it’s inane filler.

Just like the issue itself.

CREDITS

Del & Elron; writer, John Ostrander; artist and colorist, David Lloyd; letterer, Dunina Rush. Raoul; writer, Ostrander; artist and letterer, Don Simpson; colorist, Lovern Kindzierski. Subtext Salad; writers, Del Close and Ostrander; artist and letterer, William Messner-Loebs; colorist, Kindzierski. Editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Wasteland 8 (July 1988)

This issue ends on a relative high point, which sort of disguises its otherwise stinky nature.

The first story, from Ostrander and Tom Artis, is about a husband suggesting to his wife he’s a serial killer. It’s mostly dialogue and Ostrander’s dialogue isn’t particularly special. Worse, Artis’s art is awful. The guy’s clearly not ready for Little League, much less DC.

The second story, with Messner-Loebs art, is a little better. Ostrander and Close have a bunch of references to classic detective stories–and Chinatown–and the concept’s mildly amusing. A synopsis might be a better read however. The art makes the story worthwhile.

The final story is more autobiography from Close (scripted by Ostrander). Simpson’s art’s never outstanding, but the story of an actor getting stoned on pain killers before working on the Blob sequel is funny. Ostrander does a much better job here pacing his scenes too.

CREDITS

Heebee Geebeeies; writer, John Ostrander; penciller, Tom Artis; inker, Tim Dzon; letterer, John Costanza. The Dead Detective; writers, Ostrander and Del Close; artist and letterer, William Messner-Loebs. The Eye, Like Some Strange Balloon; writers, Close and Ostrander; artist and letterer, Don Simpson. Colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Contemporaneously…

Wasteland 7 (June 1988)

This issue’s a little indistinct. It opens with the conclusion to the theater company having trouble in the South story. It’s all wrap-up and exposition, which doesn’t make for the most interesting story. Freeman’s artwork is fine but not memorable at all. Ostrander inexplicably concentrates on the nostalgic elements.

The second story, with art from Lloyd–with shouldn’t be doing psychedelic art under any circumstances–is about a guy who trips to go save the world from DNA. There’s a setup for it and all, but it’s really loose work from Ostrander and Close.

I suppose the final story–Ostrander and Close again together, Simpson on art–has the most personality. It’s a genially cold hearted bit about a former circus worker who agrees the pet sit a giraffe. Simpson’s art is perfect for it, but the script confuses funny with mean-spirited.

The issue’s middling, but not bad.

CREDITS

On the Road part 2 or How We Changed the Price of Whiskey at the Butterfly Mine #2 in West Virginia; writer, John Ostrander; artist, George Freeman; colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; letterer, Ron Muns. Secret Lords of the DNA!; writers, Del Close and Ostrander; artist and colorist, David Lloyd; letterer, Steve Craddock. The St. Louis Electric Giraffe Caper!; writers, Close and Ostrander; artist and letterer, Don Simpson; colorist, Kindzierski. Editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Contemporaneously…

Wasteland 5 (April 1988)

Ugh, another political story. This time it’s about U.S. imperialism leading to nuclear armageddon. Ostrander and Close are boring about, no real characters just vague anti-Reagan ramblings. Maybe if Simpson did a better job on the art. He lacks enthusiasm.

The second story, more of Close’s autobiographical work, is better. The setup doesn’t work and the ending is messy, but it’s definitely better. Though Messner-Loebs’s art is a little too hurried. There’s no rhythm between the art and the story; Close and Ostrander don’t write enough for the artist on it.

The third story’s phenomenal, however. Lloyd’s on the art. The story’s about Close and Ostrander brainstorming. It’s a funny recursive loop on their creative process with good cameos. The Lloyd art makes it a further joy, especially when the writers become stand-ins for DC’s Cain and Abel.

The issue’s a mixed bag, but ends strong.

CREDITS

This Time We Win!; writers, John Ostrander and Del Close; artist and letterer, Don Simpson. Under the Lash; writers, Close and Ostrander; artist and letterer, William Messner-Loebs. Big Crossover Issue; writers, Ostrander and Close; artist, David Lloyd; letterer, Steve Craddock. Colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Contemporaneously…

Wasteland 4 (March 1988)

I’m not sure I’ve ever read a comic as self-important as this issue of Wasteland. I’m not making that statement lightly; it’s just hard to imagine anything more pretentious.

For example, Ostrander’s first story–set against a Shakespeare sonnet–is about how the only rational response to Ronald Reagan’s presidency is to kill oneself. Or your loved ones. Freeman’s art isn’t bad, but it’s achingly pretentious.

At least the second story, with Messner-Loebs art, isn’t political. Close joins Ostrander for the story of a paranoid woman who’s right to be afraid. It doesn’t make much impression, maybe because it’s so forced and obvious. Nice art though.

Simpson does a sloppy job on the art for the final story. The story–again, Close and Ostrander–is about celebrities escaping justice. It’s bad and unfunny. It’s also dumb. The dumb hurts it the most.

Close and Ostrander go overboard here.

CREDITS

Sonnet LXVI; writer, John Ostrander; artist, George Freeman; letterer, Ron Muns. A Safe Place; writers, Ostrander and Del Close; artist and letterer, William Messner-Loebs. Celebrity Rights; writers, Ostrander and Close; artist and letterer, Don Simpson. Colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Contemporaneously…

Wasteland 3 (February 1988)

This issue’s a major disappointment. Okay, maybe not major, but definitely a disappointment. There’s not a single good story in it.

The first story is Close and Ostrander riffing a little on Harvey Pekor with “American Squalor.” The Simpson art is good, the visual presentation of the anecdote is okay… it’s just not a particularly good anecdote. It’s easily the best story in the issue.

The second story–Ostrander writing, Lloyd on art–looks fine. World-weary cop navigates the Hellish urban metropolis while questioning faith. It’s predictable and unoriginal. Ostrander never comes up with a single good, fresh moment. Never even approaches one.

He and Close reteam for the final story. It’s a first person serial killer one. Very risqué, if one’s trying to do a cologne ad yuppie as a serial killer. Freeman’s art is highly stylized, but technically competent.

The issue’s a waste of time and talent.

CREDITS

American Squalor; writers, Del Close and John Carpenter; artist and letterer, Don Simpson. Dies Illa; writers, Ostrander and Close; artist, David Lloyd; letterer, Steve Craddock. Lotus Blossom; writers, Ostrander and Close; artist, George Freeman; letterer, Ron Muns. Colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.

Contemporaneously…

Wasteland 1 (December 1987)

The strangest thing about Wasteland is how the story about tripping is the least trippy story of the three in this issue.

The trippy story is the last one, an ostensibly autobiographic one written by Del Close, recounting a trip through the Chicago sewers. Don Simpson does the art and the art’s great and the writing’s amusing, but it’s cute and the rest of the issue isn’t.

The first story, by John Ostrander and David Lloyd on art, is about a lethal hallucinogen. The art’s disturbing enough to cover some of Ostrander’s weaker “cop” dialogue moments. It’s a decent enough start and not at all upbeat.

The middle story, with Ostrander and Close co-writing, is the stunner. William Messner-Loebs does the art and, even though it’s “real,” it’s rather trippy stuff. It’s an absurdist future story with some really thought-provoking, disturbing “comic” moments. It’s the issue’s best.

CREDITS

Foo Goo; writer, John Ostrander; co-plotter, Del Close; artist, David Lloyd. R.ab.; writers, Ostrander and Close; artist and letterer, William Messner-Loebs. Sewer Rat; writers, Close and Ostrander; artist, Don Simpson. Colorist, Lovern Kindzierski; editor, Mike Gold; publisher, DC Comics.