Category: 1991
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If the best part of your movie is a Starship song recycled from the nearly unrelated previous entry in the franchise… you’re in trouble. It’s not hard to identify the biggest problem with Mannequin: On the Move, but it feels somewhat bad to single out Kristy Swanson when there’s so much other terrible stuff going…
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Wait, Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead made money? It didn’t make a lot of money, but it probably turned a profit. The movie’s a star vehicle for Christina Applegate, who clearly doesn’t deserve one. Her performance is laughably awful and amateurish; it’s as though the filmmakers realized she wasn’t likable and just went ahead…
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Despite all Danny DeVito’s vulgar innuendos–though there are a couple missed opportunities–Other People’s Money is a rather chaste film. Director Jewison’s model for it is a Hollywood classic, with exquisite gowns for DeVito’s love interest slash rival, Penelope Ann Miller, and hats for the men. With photography from Haskell Wexler and Alvin Sargent’s thoughtful, deliberate…
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City Slickers is a mid-life crisis comedy. I had forgotten about that aspect of it. All three principals–Billy Crystal, Bruno Kirby and Daniel Stern–start the movie in a funk. Well, actually only Crystal. The other two’s problems reveal themselves throughout. Especially Kirby. His backstory takes so long to reveal, it strains believability. It’s not believable…
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While Petrie’s a decent director, it’d probably be hard to screw up Toy Soldiers. The movie mostly relies on Sean Astin, who’s more than capable of carrying it, so long as one likes Astin. So, if you like Astin and think Keith Coogan’s funny… it works. I’m not sure how one’s supposed to respond to…
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Watching The Naked Gun 2½, its’s almost immediate clear the missing Z-A or is it A-Z (being Jerry Zucker and Jim Abrahams) are the ones who made the first film funny. They don’t contribute to this one’s script—instead it’s just the other Z, David Zucker (who also directs) and Pat Proft. The script is so…
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Ninja Bachelor Party is the story of a listless young man with a cheating girlfriend and insensitive parents; he’s trying to deal with his Robitussin® addiction. And he wants to be a ninja. So he goes to Korea to train. There is no party. I suppose the protagonist, played by Kevin Booth, is a bachelor.…
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I indistinctly remember the last time I saw Dead Again, I didn’t think much of it. I don’t know what I could have been thinking. Until the last act, which slaps a mystery conclusion onto an amnesia thriller without enough padding, the film’s utterly fantastic. Branagh’s direction is great, but the most striking thing initially…
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It’s sort of amazing how little personality Kevin Reynolds brings to Robin Hood. I suppose his direction is adequate, but his shots are absent any creativity. Of course, maybe the shots were very creative and then Michael Kamen’s score–a combining, for the most part, of his Die Hard and Lethal Weapon scores–came in and ruined…
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F/X2 is very affable. It’s so affable, it encourages one to overlook its major shortcomings. First off, it’s a PG sequel to an R-rated original, which cuts down on the grit (though rated PG-13, the rating’s needlessly inflated with minor nudity). Second, it’s got Toronto standing in for New York. There’s some New York location…
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Wow, I’ve never written about an Albert Pyun movie for the Stop Button? I hadn’t realized how lucky I’ve been over the last five years not to see one. Actually, I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a Pyun movie as an adult. Dollman went straight to video. Some of it looks like it might…
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Not much to recommend Next Men this time. Byrne handles his violent action sequence well, but he’s also selling a U.S. senator killing a federal agent. Who knows, maybe it’s all a Tea Party thing. Regardless, no longer interested in the series. The Creep is, again, excellent. I can’t believe Arcudi’s writing it. And Eaglesham’s…
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This oversized issue opens and closes with an Aliens two-parter. Loose art from Guinan and Akins doesn’t help Arcudi’s script. It’s absolutely incomprehensible if you don’t read the Aliens series. Byrne finally produces a Next Men I’m not interested in. It’s two government guys revealing all. The art’s really, really mediocre. It’s like even Byrne…
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Sin City is really bad this time. The amount of white space suggests Miller didn’t spend a lot of time drawing it. It also doesn’t seem like he spent much time writing it. Even with his terrible narration, this installment is a new low. Though I guess some of it does sound a lot like…
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The big surprise this issue is Byrne’s Next Men. It’s actually pretty solid (though I think it features all four Byrne faces). The art’s great–nice flow of action–and the story’s intriguing. I think it’s the strongest narrative structure I’ve ever read from Byrne (though it might just be because it’s a prologue). Geary’s got a…
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It turns out all I need to like Homicide is a good artist. I think Arcudi fashioned the story to fit Morrow’s sensibilities, but it’s easily the best dialogue Arcudi’s written on the series. Morrow really shows how important an artist is in making a mediocre (at best) script work. Geary’s got a single page…
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The Bacchus story is a really upsetting story of Simpson, Bacchus’s sidekick, and his journey through hell. I’m not up on my Dante, but it seems like it follows Inferno a little bit. It’s a good story, but it’s a real downer and very different from the other Bacchus entries so far. The Heartbreakers story…
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I’m having trouble figuring out the big deal with Sin City. I mean, it looks cool and all, but isn’t Marv on the run from the cops a lot like that issue of “Batman: Year One” with the Batman running from the cops. The narration’s overbearing and all… but it’s fine as a stupid diversion.…
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Heartbreakers is a little better this issue. Bennett and Guinan still don’t have a good sense of what makes a story interesting. This one implies it had potential to be interesting on the second to last page. Hughes and Story do a few pages, riffing on the idea of pin-up pages. The writing’s far from…
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This special is far from an accurate representation of Dark Horse Presents. Everything looks very professional. The Aerialist and Heartbreakers installments are both long needed establishments of the series’ ground situation. I even liked the Heartbreakers one (Bennett’s writing is far stronger from the clones’ perspective, versus their creator). There’s also lots of disposable stuff–Concrete,…
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Geier’s art on the Homicide installment is pretty weak, but Arcudi actually comes up with an interesting case. It is, of course, unfortunate then Arcudi relies on the art for the final panel. I had to read the page three times, staring at it, before I noticed the big reveal. It’s also too bad about…
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Between Gaudiano and Pugh, this issue is just an art feast. Csutoras’s writing on the Gaudiano story, Harlequin, is decent, concerning a European living in the States, his loony acquaintances and some intrigue. Gaudiano makes the protagonist’s monologues atmospheric and the regular action somewhat continental in feel. The narrative is intentionally confusing, which may get…
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If it weren’t for a one page Rich Rice cartoon of an apologetic Godzilla, this issue would be really scraping bottom. Okay, not exactly true. Buniak’s got a beautifully illustrated jungle adventure featuring Tarzan and Kong stand ins. Lovely ink washes. The story’s not strong, but the art’s the point. Otherwise, it’s a weak one.…
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When subjecting myself to Highlander II, I wanted to find the worst version possible. Over the years, the director and then the producers have returned to the film and tried to edit the footage into something more palatable. Of course, these attempts are not just hampered by the use of existing footage (it’s not like…
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Beyond Who’s Who, I don’t think I’ve read much regular DC Human Target. This special only partially counts as it was a tie-in for the failed nineties television adaptation. It’s decent, far better than I was expecting. The art from Burchett and Giordano is good and Verheiden’s writing is fine. There’s a lot of humor–Christopher…
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Seth’s second issue isn’t as clearly intended to be autobiographical as the first. The protagonist this issue is Greg. Interestingly, he and the other “cool” male character–there’s a few uncool male characters–both have long, girly hair. The character’s so asexual in his narration, it’s sort of impossible to gauge the gender until someone refers to…
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For the first issue, Seth does something kind of strange–where most series use the first issue to invite the reader, Seth uses it to distance him or her. Unless the reader was an eighties art school hipster, there’s going to be an immediate disconnect as Seth, the protagonist, isn’t the standard lead. The story, introduced…
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Furman can’t wrap up the comic in an issue, which is what Marvel’s Robocop has left so he’s undoubtedly going to leave some things hanging. Or he’s going to force it all into one issue, which is going to be a disaster. The series is wrapping up to be incredibly silly. When Marvel got rid…
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So when the series started Robocop 2 hadn’t been released and the Old Man was still a good guy. Now he’s a bad guy. But still not as bad as he was in Robocop 2. This issue ends with him manipulating Robocop into assassinating a foreign dictator. Meanwhile, Robocop’s cracking heads (but not enough to…
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Who is Andrew Wildman and why has he ruined my Robocop? Regardless of Sullivan relatively slipping, this guy is a joke. His faces are pure amateur. I suppose his figures are a little better. This issue is a waste of time, but kind of shouldn’t be. It’s a continuation of the previous one–Robocop’s wife and…
The Stop Button 