Evil (2019) s03e10 – The Demon of the End

“Evil” leans heavily on this season finale being a transitory one, making efforts to close off some strangling story arcs. There’s some more complicated Katja Herbers and Mike Colter making eyes at each other; she, of course, doesn’t know his demon is just her in a schoolgirl outfit, which gets touched on this episode. Nun Andrea Martin shames Colter for not keeping his demons in check. She’s seemingly forgiven him from a few episodes ago, so now they can have awkward moments while Herbers’s husband, Patrick Brammall, is around for once.

Presumably. The show never seems to have Brammall available when they need him. He gets a significant arc in this episode, which ends with at least two threads going into season four. The only person without a future-facing plot line is Aasif Mandvi, actually. He’s just along for the ride.

The episode begins with a resolution to last episode’s shocking cliffhanger. Turns out Li Jun Li isn’t going to be a new regular; there are some “trust us, we’re the Catholic Church” shenanigans, with the episode further pressing the religiosity button. They try real hard to give Herbers a “questioning her agnosticism” story arc. She makes a deal with God and everything at one point. It’s not a great arc, but Herbers is lined up for an all-time big reaction scene at the beginning of next season, so the show makes it up to her. And it does give her and Colter more time together.

There’s a possibility Wallace Shawn is joining the show as a regular next episode. It seems like the job’s his if he wants it. He’s good. But the show’s also set up so it doesn’t need him to return regularly to keep things going; they’ve got the requisite cast down to an already unmanageable ten, but with fourteen or so familiar characters. It’s such a big show for so little.

The case involves Herbers’s previously off-screen only newish neighbor, Quincy Tyler Bernstine. Bernstine and Herbers share a duplex, an arrangement the show’s never made particularly clear before. The place next door is haunted and it seems to be because Brammall flushed a demon baby head down the toilet at the beginning of the season. The mystery keeps Herbers close to home for her family arc there; otherwise, it’s barely relevant. The big season finale stuff more involves Brammall, and then Herbers’s missing egg from her fertility clinic. They tack a scene on with it to get to the main cliffhanger.

It’s okay? Probably the smoothest John Dahl-directed episode I remember and, given my aversion to seeing Rockne S. O’Bannon’s name on the script credit, probably his smoothest episode too? It’s “Evil,” there’s only so much it can ever do.

Oh, there is some great stuff with Martin and Herbers’s oldest daughter, Brooklyn Shuck. It’s the first time in ages Shuck’s shown any character outside being part of the sister banter.

Evil (2019) s03e02 – The Demon of Memes

Usually, when “Evil” veers too far into Catholic Church propaganda, Katja Herbers remarks about them all being a bunch of pedophiles or pedophile enablers. I can’t remember if she mentioned they killed hundreds of indigenous Canadians and buried them in holes.

She’s not in the scenes she needs to be this episode to make such comments, so the episode—script credit to Davita Scarlett—does one big fake news related to the Church’s crimes and a second eyebrow-raiser. The first involves the episode’s “case.” Kids are spray painting a message on Catholic properties as part of an online prank; in reality, people are spray painting messages about the Church covering up the murders of hundreds of indigenous Canadian children.

The eyebrow-raiser is Mike Colter’s subplot, which has him joining the Vatican secret service. Appropriately suspicious Brian d’Arcy James recruits him, with the mission involving one of the series’s outstanding but forgotten big arcs. Not the one directly affecting most of the cast (the demonic fertility agency), but rather a considerably less pressing one. Colter asks about the fertility agency, but the Vatican’s not interested. Live demon babies are a-okay.

But obviously, the Vatican secret service is for laundering Nazi gold and shuffling rapists.

Anyway.

The rest of the episode checks most of the “Evil” boxes. The kids are slightly in danger: daughter Brooklyn Shuck knows a boy who’s doing the pranks; he’s got to do it. Otherwise, this demon the kids can see on Google Maps will kill him. Herbers and Aasif Mandvi investigate—Colter’s called away on secret business—and find a grad student (Jay Will) squatting. The episode flexes about unused living spaces and people experiencing homelessness, but it’ll demonize them by the end.

Shuck accidentally sees the demon on Google Maps, so she’s worried she’ll be next. The show never explains how her friend, Uly Schlesinger, who’s locked himself in his room for days, counting down the clock on the curse, has apparently been doing the required tasks for the demon. Shuck starts the list: they all occur outside your room.

That plot takes a backseat to Colter’s, which is fine; it’s not a very good mystery. And at least Colter’s plot is intriguing. Though Herbers and Mandvi do go visit returning guest star Brooke Bloom for a scene; it’s the first Herbers has seen Bloom since killing her serial killer husband, which Colter definitely knows about but thinks the visit is okay, and Mandvi suspects and maybe doesn’t think the visit is okay.

Meanwhile, Christine Lahti, Michael Emerson, and Tim Matheson are conspiring against Herbers’s husband, Patrick Brammall. He wants to kick Lahti out of his house—which, unbeknownst to Brammall, would probably put his daughters very much in immediate danger from Emerson. It’s a weird subplot because Brammall’s such a jackass you’re rooting for the bad guys to get him off the show.

It’s a very low okay episode. Herbers and Shuck don’t have enough chemistry in their mother and daughter scenes, the one jump scare’s super cheap, and the cliffhanger’s boring. But at least Colter gets something to do; hopefully, that emphasis will continue this season.

Teen Wolf (1985, Rod Daniel)

Teen Wolf is a rather dire Wolf. The best things about the movie are James Hampton as the dad and the werewolf makeup, which seems entirely designed to allow for a stuntman to play Michael J. Fox when he’s decked out.

Otherwise, it’s never better than middling and often much worse. Some of the problem is the script, though clearly not all of it, unless writers Jeph Loeb and Matthew Weisman introduced subplots to never address later, but most of it’s director Daniel and maybe editor Lois Freeman-Fox. Teen Wolf’s got absolutely no flow. Every scene feels like it’s the first time the characters have ever met… wait, I guess that one is script-related. Loeb and Weisman don’t do character arcs.

Ostensibly, Teen Wolf is about Fox accepting himself for himself and realizing his best friend Susan Ursitti is the right girl for him even though she’s not glamorous like Lorie Griffin. Griffin’s surprisingly not a cheerleader, instead doing a one-woman version of Gone With the Wind for theater teacher Scott Paulin. The film goes out of its way to suggest Paulin’s abusing her, but it’s always a joke because girls are property in Wolf. Paulin’s terrible. There’s not much good acting in Teen Wolf and some really bland bad acting, but Paulin somehow manages to be bad, bland, and eccentric. He’s atrocious.

Of course, Daniel doesn’t direct the actors. At all. Fox is all over the place, whereas Ursitti and Griffin are nowhere. Hampton handles it because he’s a professional, then other supporting actors just sort of luck into not needing much direction because the script’s so thin, or the film’s cut their characters down to nothing. Mark Arnold’s the bad guy; he’s Griffin’s boyfriend who goes to another high school. He’s on the basketball team, and they regularly trounce Fox and his team.

So, Teen Wolf is a bad high school sports movie with a werewolf subplot. When Fox turns into a werewolf when the wolfsbane blooms and the autumn moon is bright… well, wait, no. Fox can turn into a werewolf whenever he wants. The movie treats lycanthropy as peculiar but not unheard-of; it’s one of the script’s most successful moves because it allows Arnold to be a credible threat. He hates Fox for being different. The werewolf “curse” is an othering thing, not a bloodlust thing.

Griffin thinks it’s hot, Ursitti thinks it’s not, but Fox wants to be popular, so he’s going with blonde Griffin. But, again, Griffin’s not some popular girl; she’s the one being groomed and abused by the theater teacher. She hates her boyfriend and, seemingly, her life. Small wonder with both Arnold and Paulin treating her like their personal property and then Fox trying to do the same.

Though Fox is also miserable. He’s miserable before he’s the werewolf, miserable after. It doesn’t go anywhere.

Jerry Levine plays Fox’s obnoxious best bro. Levine needs some direction. He’s supposed to be an amusing wiseass. He’s a desperately unfunny one instead. Despite being filmed in Pasadena (in for Nebraska), Teen Wolf feels like a Canadian movie from the era that statement was a pejorative, and Levine seems like the one American who went north trying to make it. And then not.

Also, Daniel didn’t have Fox get rid of his Canadian “sorries.”

Besides Hampton and Arnold, the other decent performance is Matt Adler as Fox’s friend who doesn’t like the werewolf business. It’s not a subplot in the film (probably in the script, maybe even filmed), but Daniel and Freeman-Fox only leave it in the background of the finished product, with Adler not even getting to voice his discomfort. Other people talk about him when he’s not around.

But he’s got an arc.

Also, Fox’s teammates Mark Holton and Doug Savant get an arc. They watch him become an attention-seeking ball hog and don’t like playing anymore. Savant gets Teen Wolf’s biggest diss when he’s shut out of the third act.

Jay Tarses plays Fox’s basketball coach. He’s terrible but funny, like Daniel couldn’t screw up Tarses’s deliveries even when working against them. James MacKrell plays the mean vice principal. He’s bad and not funny.

Teen Wolf is a smelly dog. It doesn’t even help it’s only ninety-two minutes. Daniel and Freeman-Fox constantly use slow motion to drag things out.

Oh, and the original soundtrack… woof.

Outlander (2014) s01e02 – Castle Leoch

This episode features a scene where highlander heartthrob Sam Heughan fails to rescue a woman from being raped. It’s a flashback. Time-traveling World War II nurse Caitriona Balfe is just making intrusive conversation. The rapist is Tobias Menzies, who plays Balfe’s future husband and his present-day, eighteenth-century ancestor. Balfe mooning over memories of Menzies while his other visual representation is as a vicious rapist is another of the show’s wild swings but whatever. Let’s concentrate on the show making a point to objectify the victim.

When I thought “Outlander” was throwing the nudity into the home video releases, it kind of made sense. Dudes buy blu-rays, and dudes like pointless nudity. But “Outlander” is a show targeted at women. From a book series targeted at women. So Heughan is all heroic and fantastic for the women viewers, then there’re numerous shots of the victim’s boobs to appeal to the women’s male partners? Then there’s another pointless nude scene for Balfe.

I guess Heughan’s got very shiny pecs in a warm light scene but the show’s otherwise anti-beefcake. Just vulnerable women naked, both times without their consent. It feels very off and very odd.

The episode story pairs with the last one, with Balfe getting acclimated in the past while poorly narrating the experience. She’s overly confident in her knowledge of history, and it gets her in trouble. The show doesn’t think about the connotations of her being unreliable in her self-confidence, not even bringing in the narration being past tense so she’d be aware of her failings. There are some renaissance fair-ready costumes, an ally for Balfe in Annette Badland, and a pal in Lotte Verbeek. Balfe needs all the friends she can get because Graham McTavish is having her followed everywhere by a couple of his goons, and at least one of them definitely wants to rape Balfe. He wanted to rape her last episode; he’s ominously eying her this one; the other goon tells her to watch out because he’s rapey. So even though she’s seemingly safe, she’s not. Correspondingly, of course, no women are, and yet we’re supposed to like the dudes.

“Outlander” is very much a “the patriarchy isn’t real” type of show.

Balfe also meets the local lord, played by Gary Lewis. He’s McTavish’s brother and has a degenerative disease, so there’s a weird relationship between the two. Both give fine performances, even with the tepid writing.

Besides being boring and the narration being bad—not to mention the “but it’s realistic, so it’s okay” nudity—“Outlander”’s biggest problem is the thoughtless plotting. Also, in addition to the flashbacks, there are flash-forwards to inform Balfe’s character development. So "Outlander"'s also got the problem of being very cheaply told.

Though Heughan would make a good live-action He-Man, I guess.

Outlander (2014) s01e01 – Sassenach

I’ve been operating under the misconception the home video version of Sassenach was an extended cut, and they’d added all the nudity. Nope, it was apparently in the original Starz version. Cool.

The nudity’s all of star Caitriona Balfe, who’s the narrator and protagonist of the show, but when it comes time to drop her drawers, the eyes are all director John Dahl’s. “Outlander” is a historical hard sci-fi romance. Except for the most history in this episode is Balfe’s husband Tobias Menzies droning on about his family genealogy. The only thing more boring than actual genealogy? Some boring dude talking about fake genealogy. Menzies and Balfe are in Scotland on a post-World War II holiday; they’re trying to reconnect after being apart for five years. He was in military intelligence—not an agent himself, but the office guy who sent them to their deaths—and she was a nurse.

Supposedly they’ve been having a rough time since the end of the war, but it seems mostly to be a lack of trying. In the tedious narration, Balfe explains whenever they’re having problems, all they need to do is get jiggy, and then they’re fine. Though they may need to get jiggy in public for it to work. Or at least be a little exhibitionist-y about it. Not to kink shame. Though it’s very unclear why Dahl’s so keen to ogle Balfe (especially since “Outlander”’s target audience is women, you can even google it) and not Menzies. Other than once Balfe gets to the past and runs into Menzies’s ancestor he can’t shut up about, it turns out the ancestor is an eager rapist and cruel piece of shit.

Eager rapists and cruel pieces of shit are two different things on “Outlander” because Balfe eventually ends up with a group of Scottish highlanders—there be many more than one—but only two of them don’t want to rape her. One because he’s not cool with rape (Graham McTavish, who gives far and away from the best performance) and one because he’s the hot guy (Sam Heughan). Everyone in the past is filthy and gross except Heughan, forecasting his and Balfe’s chemistry. Plus, he’s injured, and she has to nurse him over and over.

The present-day material starts dull and gets worse as Menzies gets more and more enthusiastic about the genealogy, but it also becomes clear the narration isn’t going to stop. I’m not sure if the narration’s from the source novel or the writers’ room (Ronald D. Moore got the credit, which is an inglorious one), but it’s terrible. And never once matches the corresponding action. It’s like an object lesson in why poorly executed narration is so damaging.

Once Balfe gets to the past, where she brings mid-ish-twentieth century mobile army nursing techniques, the occasional helpful future knowledge tidbit, and enough curse words to shock all her new wannabe rapist pals, the narration pretty much stops. At least until the cliffhanger. But the quiet’s nice. And Heughan and Balfe do seem like they’ll have sufficient charm together. But, wow, is it a rough and endless sixty minutes.

Evil (2019) s02e02 – A Is for Angel

I don’t have this feeling often with “Evil.” Maybe ever. I can’t remember what kind of potential the show had at the start; but what if it’s good. Like what if “Evil” can get actually good. What if it can not waste its lead actors. Because after a somewhat rocky beginning where Mike Colter is in mock confession—his professor being Dylan Baker, who is either got to be very good as an evil priest or they’re doing a casting against type thing but it’s Dylan Baker so why wouldn’t you type-cast him since it’s a recurring guest spot—and the first of the episode’s Catholicism is super-sexist digs. The script’s credited to Davita Scarlett and it will blow up a lot, introduce a lot, and constantly remind the Catholic Church is garbage.

Watching Katja Herbers dispassionately smack bishop Peter Scolari with facts, which maybe last episode introduced but this episode it becomes a thing Colter comments on… it’s awesome. And it’s not even where “Evil” hints at potential achievement this episode. There’s very awkward team bonding for Colter, Herbers, and Aasif Mandvi—they’re all keeping secrets from each other, some more important than others–but they all still want to work together. But then there’s also Michael Emerson’s character taking it up a notch, particularly with fiancée Christine Lahti, and all sorts of reveals and promises for future action.

Engaging, interesting future action.

Maybe the move to Paramount+ and the freedom to CGI in the word “fuck” is what the show needed. Though—and it just occurred to me—they’re going to be able to get away with a lot more truthful presentation of the Catholic Church on streaming than they would on network.

But, no, can’t get too excited. There are still big problems—though John Dahl’s direction won me over by the end of the episode; I was very critical for the first act, but he finds a real rhythm with the actors. It hasn’t felt so much like Colter’s show since… probably ever.

It’ll take a lot to get the ship righted and unless there’s a big committed shift it’s not going to happen, but it’s been a while since I’ve enjoyed “Evil” this much. And if the character developments stick—particularly with Lahti and Emerson—the show’s going to get a lot more entertaining.

Real good supporting performances this episode too; Jessie Mueller as the new cop (the one from last season isn’t coming back apparently) who gives Herbers grief, then Joniece Abbott-Pratt and Hampton Fluker as the case for the episode—he thinks he’s possessed by an angel, she’s the concerned then endangered wife.

Also—Andrea Martin. She’s apparently joining the cast as an acerbic nun who counsels Colter and she’s a delight.

I mean, maybe it’s got a chance. Maybe’s very good for “Evil.”

Michael Hayes (1997) s01e15 – Imagine: Part 2

Despite some better than necessary acting from the guest stars and nicely competent direction from Mel Damski (though Damski can’t make the silly black and white flashbacks to last episode work and every time they’re jarring and terrible and there are a lot of times), it’s a reductive conclusion to the big conspiracy two-parter.

Given the timing, had the Enemy of the State trailer come out yet? Were CBS and new show runners Michael S. Chernuchin (who also gets sole writer credit here) and Michael Pressman just trying to get into the zeitgeist? Because even though the episode convinces most of the regular cast the world is being run by a combination of the mob and Wall Street, the conclusion punts on it. I suppose “The X-Files” was running at the time too, right? Is “Michael Hayes 4.0” going to be David Caruso versus aliens? Fingers crossed.

The episode opens with Jimmy Galeota and Mary B. Ward coming back to the show for the first time in a couple episodes. Everyone’s gotten over their grieving apparently and the dead brother, dead husband, dead father elephant in the room never gets a nod or even addressed. Chernuchin very intentionally doesn’t give Caruso much acting to do—and Damski directs for the guest stars—so it’s impossible to read any character development into the performances. There’s just a new normal and they’re trying again. Maybe this time they’ll figure it out.

Everyone’s working the conspiracy angle, which brings in Alex Rocco as a guest star (there’s also a Godfather 2 reference no one acknowledges, making it worse); Chris Mulkey’s back for a scene and he’s still bad. But Kevin Conway—who only gets a couple—is still fun. Lisa Banes and Gail Strickland are the good guest stars.

Larry Miller shows up in an overly suspicious conspiratorial part but, I mean, he’s still good. It’s Larry Miller.

“Michael Hayes” never really got a good break. The show’s first pass was already trying to correct, it got rushed through what seems to have been the most earnest stretch, and now we’re in the desperate for attention phase.

There’s a solid chunk of the season for them to try to correct or just to continue to fail, but retracting the scope of the conspiracy angle really feels like they tried sacrificing a limb to the shark in the first tank to swim on to the second.

It’s very hard to be upbeat about the show’s potential at this point.

The Green Mile (1999, Frank Darabont)

The Green Mile takes place in a world where racism wasn’t really a big problem in 1930s Mississippi—not even grieving father Nicholas Sadler is going to say something racist to the Black convicted murderer of his daughters, Michael Clarke Duncan—but it also takes place in a world where the Christian God is real so… I mean, if you’re going to give them God, might as well let them magic away the racism. Because while the film’s a character study, it’s not about death row cell block captain Tom Hanks overcoming racism—no saviors, white or otherwise, possible here—it’s about him learning the cost of betraying a miracle. But without much religiosity. Screenwriter and director Darabont has to tow a very fine line to pull it all off and tow that line he does. Unwaveringly.

Even in the exceptionally tricky second-to-third act transition. Even at the finish with the lengthy narration. Whatever Darabont tries, he accomplishes, but not without a lot of effort from everyone involved. Green Mile is downright fastidious.

The film opens with old man in a retirement home Dabbs Greer living a somewhat mysterious life. Residents aren’t allowed unaccompanied on the grounds—one imagines it’s Maine, because Green Mile’s Stephen King—but he sneaks out every day to a mysterious cabin in the woods. He’s got a lady friend, Eve Brent, and pretty soon he’s sitting her down to tell his story.

We know younger Greer is Hanks because of one of boldest moves in film narrative—we know Matt Damon’s not going to end up turning into Greer because of a bladder infection. It is the story of Greer’s worst bladder infection, cut to multiple Academy Award winner Tom Hanks essaying peeing with an untreated bladder infection in a prison in Mississippi in 1935.

And from that moment, Hanks nails the part. All the way through the next two hours and fifty minutes or whatever. No matter what happens—no matter who shows up in a stunning performance—it’s always Hanks’s movie, it’s always about his performance. When Darabont’s got to close his bookend, he takes it into account and figures a way to plug it in (though, post-CGI de-aging, there’s now a lot to say about using actors of different ages playing the same part and how it affects the verisimilitude of a picture).

Hanks runs the death row cell block–The Green Mile—as a place of serenity. No reason to agitate anyone. When the film starts, there are two prisoners awaiting execution—Graham Greene and Michael Jeter. The film takes place over a summer, with the time somewhat tracked by the executions. All of the execution scenes are tough, a couple more than others, and Darabont takes the time to inspect the men conducting the executions.

Green Mile’s a man movie. There are a couple significant parts for women, but it’s about the guys. It doesn’t try to comment toxic masculinity, but still does so because of the nature of the piece and of Darabont’s interests in the relationships between the characters. It gets into class a bit—and intentionally—while directly avoiding the race issues; Green Mile is kind of Norman Rockwell Gothic; Capracorn but sour. None of the characters are allowed to express themselves fully at work—Hanks and main work sidekick David Morse have an almost entirely silent understanding of one another—and contemporary, religiously informed gender roles don’t allow them to speak about it at home. But not even the inmates are allowed to express themselves, though sometimes it’s because they’re not able.

For example, Duncan’s character. He arrives almost immediately once the flashback starts, during an incredibly efficient introduction to Doug Hutchison’s vile twerp of a prison guard, and towers over the rest of the cast. Duncan’s just over 6’5” but Morse’s 6’4”, so they exaggerated things. Now, Duncan being a gentle giant—convicted of terrible crimes but afraid of the dark—allows Darabont to keep him passively imposing. More on the scenery than the scenes. Not having Duncan’s lack of character arc be a monumental cop out is kind of Darabont’s most incredible work, at least in how he plotted the script. It does help, of course, Duncan’s character’s initials are “J.C.” Because if you’re going to do space wizard magic, you can be obvious about it.

With Duncan and then final death row addition, Sam Rockwell, we don’t see them experience their time on death row. We see how guards Hanks, Morse, Hutchison, Barry Pepper, and Jeffrey DeMunn react to their experience of it. Greene and Jeter (especially Jeter), we see them experience it. Jeter works as a common ground between the narrative distances, which generally stick to Hanks with occasional exception. Nothing like someone not at Normandy having a video game flashback of D-Day, but, you know, not being present for mouse tricks.

More on mouse tricks in a second.

First. Rockwell. Green Mile’s got two kinds of exceptional performances. Showy and staid. Hanks and Morse give exceptional staid performances. Jeter, Hutchison, Rockwell, they give exceptional showy performances. Jeter’s is kind of staid, but he’s playing a Cajun so it’s also kind of showy. And even Hutchison gets to play showy as staid, because he’s a deceptive little shit.

Rockwell’s playing a caricature of an evil redneck; he’s playing the (literal and intentional) antithesis of Duncan, a wild cracker, loud, lanky, vicious. He’s the only character run the movie who’s ever outwardly a racist (oh, to live in Stephen King’s 1930s). Though—side note—for some reason Gary Sinise really wanted to do an uncredited cameo as an evil shit who says racist things but without the n-word. It’s a weird stunt cameo. Sinise is great but… it’s not exactly part where you want to say it doesn’t feel like acting.

Anyway.

Rockwell.

He doesn’t have an arc. He’s just a contained tornado, waiting to get loose and destroy. It’s an amazing performance. Hanks and Rockwell in the first tier of performances, Jeter and Hutchison in the second, Morse and Bonnie Hunt, then everyone else. Everyone else is great too. I mean, maybe James Cromwell is only good but he’s got the most constrained gender role part—he’s not allowed to empathize with sick wife Patricia Clarkson because society, only care for her. While able to empathize with Hunt, who plays Hanks’s wife. Never addressing toxic masculinity, but always being about toxic masculinity.

Hunt’s got the Morse part at home, basically. Supporting Hanks while showing enough agency the characters never seem hollow. No one in Green Mile ever gets stuck trying to round out a caricature, instead they only have so long to establish themselves. Darabont bakes in character and only gives his actors so long to essay it. Green Mile’s three hours but it’s always in motion, steadily progressing toward the inevitable.

And Duncan, waiting patiently in his cell, figures into that inevitable, both in the narrative and as a running symbol. Duncan’s good. It’s a hard part, requiring a lot of nimbleness—Duncan, Rockwell, and Hutchison all have to toggle immediately multiple times throughout—and Duncan succeeds. Duncan doesn’t have a caricature but he’s also got the least amount of opportunity to round it out—and the longest time before there’s some character work in the narrative; like two hours into the three.

There’s also an adorable mouse. The mouse is very important. Everyone does great with the mouse, cast and crew. Most adorably with Jeter but also Duncan and Hanks. Not sure if Morse actually acted opposite the mouse but his bemused expressions in those scenes are fantastic.

The special effects are good—Darabont’s got a definite tone he’s going for with them, which cinematographer David Tattersall is able to maintain. Tattersall does great work, editor Richard Francis-Bruce does great work (the cuts are wondrous), also excellent—minimal—score from Thomas Newman. It’s a technical marvel without ever trying for marvelous.

Well, except maybe Harry Dean Stanton’s bit part as a trustee who helps the guards practice their executions. The film lets Stanton be marvelous.

The Green Mile is an appropriately wonderful, appropriately horrific, superlative piece of work from Darabont, Hanks, Rockwell, Jeter, and down the list. Just magnificent.

Upload (2020) s01e02 – Five Stars

The best part about “Upload” this episode is Cigarette Smoking Man William B. Davis as one of the “Choak” brothers, who has died and is now living his reward after ruining American society for decades. Because Davis is good. No qualifications, no asterisks, he’s just good.

Everything else in “Upload” comes with a caveat. Even, sort of, Allegra Edwards.

Edwards is lead Robbie Amell’s girlfriend. He’s dead and in “Upload”—you have your mind put on computer and then you exist forever in an app but capitalism so everything costs money–she’s his evil rich White woman fiancée. Basically Edwards needs to be Portia de Rossi in “Arrested Development” in 2003 for it to work and it’s not 2003 and Edwards isn’t de Rossi. And “Upload” isn’t “Arrested Development.”

So while Edwards is bad, the part is thin. So a caveat. Would Edwards be good if the part were good? Doesn’t seem like it. She’s a charisma vacuum.

As opposed to Andy Allo, who plays Amell’s “angel,” the customer service rep who waits on him hand and foot—digitally—and tries to sell him virtual goods as he goes through the iAfterlife. Allo’s full of charisma. Even more than Amell, which is something since the whole show is sold on the idea he’s charming.

He’s just a little much of a tech frat bro. To the point episode writer and director and show creator Greg Daniels gives Amell’s character thin backstory but taking up the amount of time real backstory would’ve taken. Is it intentionally shallow?

Maybe?

The stuff with Allo’s dating life, which is entirely sexual encounter and app-based—complete with a rating system (the episode title refers to Allo’s pursuit of better ratings as a customer service rep from her virtual charges)—is apparently the only way the not White people can have human connection while White people like Amell and Edwards live in a CW nighttime soap opera. It’s not entirely class and wealth-based—Amell’s supposed to have working class origins so as to clash with Edwards because “Upload” is often very lazy—but it does seem to be race-related. At least in the optics.

But whatever.

It’s also not worth thinking about too hard. No one else did. You’re just supposed to stan Allo and Amell and Allo and Amell make it easy to comply.

Dead to Me (2019) s02e04 – Between You and Me

Much like the season premiere, this episode takes place an indeterminate time from the previous episode’s cliffhanger and skips over what theoretically should be some very interesting scenes as Christina Applegate and Linda Cardellini have now committed federal crimes by digging up a national forest to hide their other crime.

Crimes.

But it makes Applegate feel a lot better, which is nice because we’re no longer asked to believe she’s really worried about going to jail for all time and instead she’s at least acting like she’s in a TV show.

Lots of relationship building for Applegate and Cardellini, who stop off at a motel following their latest felony. Cardellini—now so upset she’s not talkative for the first time in the history of the show—needs to crash and Applegate needs to shower. We find out the boys (Sam McCarthy and Luke Roessler) are at home, with Max Jenkins babysitting; why aren’t they with Grandma? Because we’re going to have a small tragedy requiring them to be at home.

Applegate and Cardellini lie their way into a wedding party’s open bar and spend the evening getting drunk and bonding, with Applegate forgiving Cardellini her previous trespass and Cardellini already having forgiven Applegate for her recent trespass, though Applegate hasn’t divulged the full extent of said trespass because… well, the show’s not ready for it. The show’s not ready for Applegate the cold-blooded killer. Though Applegate at least seems ready with it.

When they get home to find the tragedy, which involves Jenkins’s little dog too, there’s a chance for Applegate to redeem herself a little as far as Cardellini goes; at least for the episode; at the end, it’s pretty clear Applegate’s not going to be troubled with keeping secrets. Cardellini, who spent last season wrestling with it, isn’t as strong.

Or as cold-blooded.

There’s a subplot involving McCarthy wanting a car because he’s a spoiled little White shithead male and it leads him to Applegate’s storage unit—what is it about this show and storage units; I mean, did Cardellini tell Applegate what they used her storage unit for last season—and sets up, presumably, the next stage of the series.

“Dead to Me” is leaps and bounds better this season, even if Jenkins and McCarthy are still major drags.