Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri (2017, Martin McDonagh)

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri needs a lot of passes. On one hand, writer and director McDonagh writes really shallow female characters outside protagonist Frances McDormand (well, part-time protagonist). On the other, he’s got a really shallow way of characterizing racists—they’re literally too dumb to know better. And then he’s got this weird way of writing Black characters, only two of whom exist in the aforementioned town. Given they immediately hit it off romantically, it’s weird they never met each other. There’s a third Black character–played by Clarke Peters—but he’s from out of town. And he’s got a way of getting the crackers in line.

There have got to be TV movies from the eighties and nineties with more depth, but not with the caliber of the cast. McDonagh gets a bunch of great performances out of his cast, who have mostly easy parts. Like Sam Rockwell as the numbskull racist stormtrooper deputy? Rockwell can do it. He can do it well. But it also doesn’t take much, which is why the performances seems less impressive after Caleb Landry Jones is able to run their scenes together. Or Zeljko Ivanek. Or Peter Dinklage. Or Lucas Hedges.

Wait, Hedges doesn’t have a scene with Rockwell, but Hedges is great and would be able to run the scene. Because Rockwell’s a victim of sorts too. His momma—Sandy Martin in an odd performance—raised him bad because she’s a numbskull racist too, what else would happen. And if it weren’t for sheriff Woody Harrelson’s terminal cancer, he might have a chance to teach Rockwell to stop torturing Black people in custody–which is a running “joke” for the first act and a bit of the second. Apparently McDonagh wanted to go for the audience who’d laugh at everyone repeatedly talking about torturing Black people but know it’s wrong. The torturing, not the laughing. His audience is very much the people who want to defend the laughing.

Harrelson gives an incredibly phoned in performance as the sheriff, who’s unable to solve the murder of McDormand’s teenage daughter (a good Kathryn Newton in flashback), so McDormand takes out three billboards drawing attention to that inability. Harrelson’s got the cancer subplot, he’s got the wife and kids subplot (though no one in the film is less important than Harrelson’s wife, Abbie Cornish, whose personality is her Australian accent), he’s too busy for a crime solving subplot.

McDonagh works a compelling enough melodrama—though, again, it’s frequently cringe-y and not just because all the guys are with women twenty years their junior and said women are just dehumanized ditz jokes—through the second act, but then fizzles when he tries to make it about the mystery. And the redemption arcs. So much redemption, so many abandoned characters.

If it were better, it’d be a mess, but McDonagh’s never able to pull it off after his first big twist. He’s only got two; neither are good. But the second one is at least in the finale, where there ought to be a big twist. The other one is where there shouldn’t be one so it draws attention and McDonagh never recovers from it.

Technically good performance from John Hawkes as McDormand’s abusive ex-husband who regularly beats her in front of their kids, which the kids have normalized and turned into a joke. Does Hawkes make the situation believable? No. But he’s good. Samara Weaving’s good as his nineteen year-old girlfriend who apparently supports him on her wages at a petting zoo or something.

Brendan Sexton III has an appropriate cameo, but it’d have worked better if I’d known it was him. Nick Searcy has a good cameo, but his name’s not on the movie because I think it came out he was too racist even for a vaguely edgy production like this one to promote. It’s in the first act when McDonagh’s writing for McDormand is best. Great scene.

Ben Davis’s photography is fine. McDonagh shoots it Panavision and can’t fill the frame, which is a bummer. Carter Burwell’s there to remind you Frances McDormand was in a Coen Brothers movie once so if you watch through half-closed eyes it seems like a Coen riff on a redneck gothic melodrama character piece. Only the movie ditches McDormand and switches to Rockwell in the third act to give it a very literal ending for the people in the audience who weren’t paying enough attention.

Otherwise, McDonagh’s direction is good. He’s very good with the cast. The problem’s his lack of insight.

McDormand’s good enough to carry it too, so when he shifts it to Rockwell, who can’t because it’s a nothing arc, way too little, way too late, Ebbing takes a big third act stumble.

It’s fine, actually. If it had a good finish with all the icky bad asterisks on it, it’d be worse. Once it’s clear McDormand and Rockwell don’t have great parts and Harrelson’s out of it… it’s fine. Just with a bunch of asterisks.

Resident Alien (2021) s01e03 – Secrets

I would feel a whole lot better about where this episode of “Resident Alien” seems to be sending Sara Tomko if it had passed Bechdel for longer than three lines. Three lines with a female writer (Njeri Brown). We get a lot of backstory into Tomko—with zero mention of the long-term abusive boyfriend from the pilot—including a big, out-of-nowhere reveal (this episode is where having read all the comics is no longer relevant) and some good character development for Tomko and dad Gary Farmer.

But it would be much better if Tomko and Alice Wetterlund had something to talk about except boys in general and Alan Tudyk in specific. Wetterlund is still hung up on Tudyk, even though he walked out on her during their date and is completely disinterested whenever she throws herself at him. There’s even, like, relevant boys stuff they could talk about but it might screw up the surprise so they don’t… also Wetterlund doesn’t really do anything. I mean, she starts the episode causing an avalanche (with dynamite) for a laugh, but later on when it’s time to party with Tomko they go drink beers, watching the cops drag the lake for Tudyk’s source human’s body, and talk about dudes.

It’s very underwhelming and seems like a waste of time for the Tomko subplot. She again gets her own.

Also getting his own subplot this episode is kid who see’s Tudyk’s alien form, Judah Prehn. He’s getting bullied at school for thinking there’s an alien in town and soon becomes friends with fellow bullied child Gracelyn Awad Rinke. Rinke doesn’t get a name yet. She’s just the Muslim girl. She’s good too, potentially even more likable than Prehn. Though Prehn and Tudyk argue on the street and it’s glorious. It’s also a little weird as a main recurring subplot.

The A plot this episode is about sheriff Corey Reynolds trying to find a body in Tudyk’s lake (the aforementioned corpse of Tudyk’s human source). Tudyk’s got insomnia over it, which is basically his main subplot. Initially they just find a foot, but since it turns into the body hunt… it’s just an escalation of the A plot. Some great moments for Reynolds again.

We also get a little bit more with deputy Elizabeth Bowen, who always gets something to do, but this episode it’s opposite Tudyk so more relevant.

There’s another alien flashback, this time involving a cowboy hat—and possibly retconning the pilot some more—and it figures into the somewhat predictable soft cliffhanger.

Also there’s again a lot of music. A lot of music. It’s a little more relevant at times and diegetic but it feels like they’re trying too hard .

So some asterisks and consternation, but the show’s still really funny, well-acted, and well-produced. I think it almost completely having thrown off the comic’s yoke might have me worried.

Though I wanted it to pass Bechdel a whole lot better than it does, just because.

Resident Alien (2021) s01e02 – Homesick

There’s a lot going on this episode. “Resident Alien” will go for (single camera) sitcom type laughs but still manage to run as a full hour long (forty-four minute) show. I was wondering if they’d be able to keep up the energy from the first episode when not doing a pilot and they succeed. Outside maybe way too much accompanying sad songs on the soundtrack in the last ten minutes, they excel.

The episode—written by show creator Chris Sheridan—does some “season order” corrections to the pilot, like introducing Gary Farmer as Sara Tomko’s father and everyone seeming to forget her previously established abusive boyfriend backstory. Tomko gets a bunch to do this episode—Alan Tudyk’s got like four things going on, Tomko sharing in one of them, then she’s got her own one with Farmer as her sidekick. Then there’s a sixth one, tied to the prologue, which seems like it’s one of Tudyk’s but is actually separate….

Very full episode.

It starts (after a mysterious prologue) with Tudyk’s first day as the town doctor, which is where the previous episode ended. Here we get the resolution to cliffhanger—young Judah Prehn being able to see Tudyk’s true alien form (one in a bazillion chance), screaming, running out. It’s going to set up a whole plot with Tudyk plotting against Prehn and then bickering with him, which is going to have threads for mayor Levi Fiehler and sheriff Corey Reynolds, who continues to be hilarious.

Then Tudyk’s got his subplot with bartender Alice Wetterlund, who’s not hiding her being interested in him; though Tudyk’s entirely oblivious. They go bowling. It’s funny.

So far the show seems to be leveraging Tudyk’s comedic abilities—his performance is a fine mix of Jeff Bridges Starman and John Lithgow “3rd Rock” as he tries to grapple with his new human emotions—and Tomko’s dramatic sympathies. Farmer helps.

High points include the first day of doctoring montage, Reynolds as a trash talking bowler, Tudyk fantasizing about killing a little kid, and the flashbacks to Tudyk as an alien where the gross but not like violent gross shines.

There’s less developing Tudyk and Tomko’s relationship than expected—especially since she’s his sidekick at the clinic—but the parallel character development works out just fine.

Besides the too many songs, “Resident Alien” is doing just fine. The adjustments from the pilot may even be for the better long-term… we shall see.

The Hunt for Red October (1990, John McTiernan)

Sean Connery, who’s so important to the workings of Hunt for Red October he could easily be “and special guest star” credit instead of top-billed, has his last scene on the bridge of his ship, giving a very Captain Kirk read of a quote. It’s something about sailing and it’s got to break the cultural barrier and touch the audience too, which says something about the target audience.

The film has an Oppenheimer quote earlier so I thought maybe they’d do something with him again but no. Connery goes out on a Christopher Columbus quote, which dates the thing more than all the Soviet and U.S. Cold War stuff. Though there’s a funny part where Connery mopes to first officer and confident Sam Neill about how the decades-long submarine cold war hasn’t had any battles or memorials, just casualties. So I guess if there were battles and memorials… it’d be… good?

It’s unclear. We don’t get a lot into Connery’s character—that scene ends up being more of a showcase for Neill than anything else—but apparently the core of the character is he wants to fights with sticks and stones, not nukes. Or something. Maybe he’s sad about his wife dying. Everyone acts like he’s super sad about it, but Connery’s barely in the movie and there’s no character development for him.

Meanwhile, Alec Baldwin gets all sorts of pseudo-character development though he’s only around to bring the plot threads together. There are three main ones, with a couple splinters; first, there’s Connery, who’s either defecting from the USSR and giving the United States a fancy new Russian submarine because reasons or he’s lost it and is going to nuke the Eastern Seaboard. Then there’s CIA analyst, desk jockey Baldwin who flies from London to Washington on a hunch for something tangentially related but not enough; luckily the script’s perfectly comfortable being entirely contrived, so pretty soon Baldwin’s on an adventure. Then there’s Scott Glenn and Courtney B. Vance. They’re on an American submarine and they’re tracking Connery’s sub before Baldwin even gets to the plot.

I’d hope someone realized if they were taking it seriously, one of those four actors would have to be the protagonist but Red October does what it can do minimize its need for a protagonist. Sure, it’s Baldwin. But not really at all. And not just because Baldwin’s performance is goofy. And the range of Red October’s performances seem to be who can best combine macho and stoic, with silver fox Connery (it’s a stunning hairpiece) the obvious top dog. McTiernan’s direction of the actors is middling, with no one ever paying off as much as they should. Baldwin excepted because he’s so absurdly miscast. The part’s crap, sure, but McTiernan especially should’ve realized when the male action hero talks to himself during tense situations it needs to create at least an empathetic response.

Instead, Baldwin’s whiney and exasperating and artificial. He does get into his action sequence at the end, however. Shows more energy than anything else he does in the entire film. Rolling with enthusiasm. Literally.

Connery’s got no meat to the part but he’s pretty good. Likable for sure. Red October works with him being omnipresent but not overbearing. Neill’s almost good but the part’s too shallow. The only thing worse than no personality in Red October is some personality dump in exposition. Tim Curry actually makes out best as far as personality just because he’s only got to play annoying and screenwriters Larry Ferguson and Donald E. Stewart can do annoying.

Scott Glenn’s the best of the leads. Even he’s not particularly good, he’s just good for the circumstances. The movie doesn’t need good actors, it just needs competent ones. It’s about a Russian submarine nuking New York—maybe—the stakes are inherent.

James Earl Jones is fine as Baldwin’s boss. Ditto Richard Jordan as a government guy. Fred Thompson’s good, of course, as one of the places Baldwin goes on his quest to find Connery and the grail. Whoops, wrong movie.

Vance is really good, which isn’t easy because the movie makes fun of him for being a Black man who knows classical music and is good at his job. Anthony Peck’s great as Glenn’s first officer.

It’s a big cast and it takes a lot for anyone to be actually bad. Not when Baldwin’s running around making it seem like a car commercial on steroids. Though Joss Ackland’s pretty blah as the Russian ambassador. He’s only got two scenes so who cares.

Technically, Red October starts better than it finishes. McTiernan holds back on the big underwater submarine special effects sequences, making it seem like they’re going to be great. Only then it turns out they don’t have the torpedo composites down so all the best special effects are the submarine suspense ones. Even the peculiar “race through the underwater canyons” sequence has solid effects… it’s just a complete waste of time.

The movie hinges on something it hides from the audience to get from the second act to third so it’s not like Red October’s aiming particularly high anyway.

Basil Poledouris’s music is low mediocre. A big disappointment. Ditto Jan de Bont’s photography; it’s never particularly impressive but there’s some terrible lighting in important scenes—neither McTiernan and de Bont seem to have a handle on the submarine parts of the movie, which seems like it’d be important but whatever.

The Hunt for Red October is a long two hours and fifteen minutes. A compelling lead—any compelling lead—would probably help things quite a bit. It does pick up in the second half, which is quite nice. It’s not like the pace improving makes it obvious the first hour is boring… the first hour is very boring as it unfolds, so the speed-up is welcome and unexpected.

If Baldwin weren’t such a flat lead, who knows. But there’d still be lots of other problems. Like Terence Marsh’s occasionally anachronistic, occasionally silly production design.

Finally, doesn’t matter, but the sound editing and design is excellent.

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (2018) s02e14 – The Returned

I’ve really liked co-writer Oanh Ly’s episodes in the past, so The Returned being such a mess is a bummer. Even if it weren’t for the problematic resolve to Miranda Otto’s love affair with visiting witch Skye P. Marshall—who gets a big spotlight this episode to have it torn away twice—or how Lachlan Watson’s Romeo and Romeo star-crossed thing with Jonathan Whitesell gets shrugged off after a single episode because the show can’t figure out anything to do with Watson who’s been a regular since episode one, there’s so many narrative backtracks it’s hard to keep track. Not to mention the whole point of the episode is to bring back dead characters in order to give living cast members performatively cathartic outbursts.

Not to mention poor Michelle Gomez; turns out the writers have no surprises for her, just more obvious, wrenching tragedy. It’s a complete waste of Gomez (whose Earthly version is background for already background Richard Coyle) and seems like unnecessary filler. I wonder at what point “Sabrina” knew they weren’t getting another season from Netflix because I was under the impression these episodes were long in the can before Netflix officially canceled them. It might explain some of the mess. I hope it explains some of the mess.

So the episode opens with Kiernan Shipka trying to adjust to her latest new normal—including rekindled beau Gavin Leatherwood—and supporting her human friends as they get ready for a “Battle of the Bands” at the high school. Someone directly asks Shipka if she’ll be participating and she says no, which is important later because apparently she just didn’t want to play with those friends and because “Sabrina” needed to have a three song “Battle of the Bands” scene. One of the bands is back from the dead—which turns out to be Marshall’s plot, playing a board game against Eldritch Terror Oliver Rice—and has history with Ross Lynch’s dad, Christopher Rosamond.

But this band isn’t the only resurrected, there’s also previous series regular Abigail Cowen, back to give some closure to Tati Gabrielle and Adeline Rudolph, but also Christine Willes as Alessandro Juliani’s mother who has it in for Lucy Davis because she’s married to her little boy, not to mention the profoundly pointless Georgie Daburas as Shipka’s long dead dad. It’s a nothing finish for a character arc I think Shipka started the series with.

The episode’s so cheap it falls back on dogs being cute to get it through. It’s a rather desperate outing, with every one of its plots failing to resolve adequately, not to utterly wasting the cast’s time.

All Rise (2019) s02e04 – Bad Beat

So the episode synopsis for Bad Beat said something about Lindsey Gort being missing and I got real hopeful she was leaving the show—the cast is way too big anyway and she’s obnoxious—but she gets back pretty quick. Wilson Bethel’s all worried about her but she just went to her place, which she’s been keeping through the pandemic because Bethel’s too good of friends with Simone Missick for Gort to commit to their relationship.

Gort’s worried Bethel’s going to sabotage his career by going after lying cops who framed someone. But it’s okay in the end because not only does Bethel have Steven Williams on his side—Williams gets a major sidekick demotion here—but also now Audrey Corsa. Corsa’s the assistant in the D.A.’s office whose been seeing J. Alex Brinson casually; she hates cops because her family is all cops and they gave her a “get out of jail free” white girl card she apparently used a lot and feels really bad about that privilege.

The episode’s got an interesting take on cops being shitty this episode because it seems like Missick’s finally going to realize her husband, Todd Williams, manipulates, coerces, and psychologically abuses people to get them to work for the FBI, not to mention boss Marg Helgenberger viciously using her position as judge to terrorize the marginalized and scared.

It’s all happy by the end of the episode or whatever but for a while it seems like “All Rise” might actually do some real character development, which would be particularly nice for Missick since her plot line this episode is basically being helpless because she’s pregnant (and tired all the time) and then something something with her impartiality or whatever.

It doesn’t matter. The legalese of “All Rise” is the most disposable thing about the show, which is saying something.

Brinson’s got a not bad subplot about how he doesn’t just want to throw more Black kids in jail. He tries talking to boss Reggie Lee about it, but Lee shuts him down (to later tell Brinson all he had to do was ask to talk to him about it). Jessica Camacho’s part of the Missick and Williams case, which she complicates because she’s waging war on the D.A.’s office. Unfortunately Tom Gallop’s a pretty weak foil as the A.D.A. she’s bickering with.

There’s a subplot about Lindsay Mendez palling around with Helgenberger and hustling the other judges for poker. It’s like they needed to use guest stars Paul McCrane (who also directed) and Peter MacNichol so they got to play in this pointless subplot.

Then there’s Samantha Marie Ware getting involved with Ruthie Ann Miles’s (entirely offscreen) love life problems; it’s almost like they’ve got way too many cast members and nowhere near enough story.

The 13th Warrior (1999, John McTiernan)

No one in The 13th Warrior seems particularly thrilled to be participating in The 13th Warrior. Some people carry it better than others—Omar Sharif’s cameo is the only “good” acting in the film, as he translates and interprets events for lead Antonio Banderas, who can’t speak the common language with the Vikings they’ve come across. Vladimir Kulich, as Beowulf (13th Warrior is an adaptation of co-producer and shadow director Michael Crichton’s novel, Eaters of the Dead, which is a riff on Beowulf), is kind of fine. His presence is indicative of the problem with Warrior, which is no one wants to take it seriously and actually ask anyone to act, so they just get a handful of personable actors and a handful of romance novel cover models and put the band together. Kulich at least takes it seriously. Taking it seriously requires effort, which is on short supply.

And, really, on short demand. No one cares. William Wisher and Warren Lewis’s screenplay is not some poorly realized masterpiece. It’s a Viking movie with an Arabian guest star. With Antonio Banderas as a tenth century Muslim traveler—based on a real person, but the film… avoids treating Banderas as a real person. The script avoids Banderas as a person so much it isn’t until the last battle, which is a very noncommittal Seven Samurai homage because neither credited director McTiernan or uncredited Crichton are any good at the action. It’s particularly stunning from McTiernan considering he made Predator and the “monsters” in Warrior decapitate and camouflage too. Warrior’s almost willfully bad.

Anyway—the movie doesn’t show Muslim Banderas pray until the last battle scene. How Banderas is going to pray five times a day—at set times—while traveling with a bunch of Vikings on a mission to kill a monster and save a village? Exploring that culture clash would probably be interesting. But they can’t do it because it’s an action movie with what ought to be a pulpy premise but instead wants to get executed like a nerdy one and it’s not. Warrior either needs a compelling lead, compelling adversaries, or compelling cannon fodder (the Vikings slash samurai). It’s got none of those things. And it’s not even Banderas’s fault. He’s not good, but it’s very clearly not his fault. His biggest scene—outside that one prayer—is when he figures out how to speak Old Norse just from sitting around and listening to the Vikings talk for a couple hours. Now, if it’d been set over weeks and the journey had narrative weight, Warrior might have something going but of course it doesn’t because it’s terrible. And the whole translating thing really shouldn’t have been raised because initially it just makes you think Sharif’s going to be sticking around longer and he’s really just there to give the movie some actual Hollywood Middle Eastern star cred before turning it all over to not Middle Eastern Hollywood star Banderas.

Again, it’s a big shame as Sharif’s a lot of fun and he’s able to make Banderas likable in a way the film never repeats. Particularly not for Banderas’s romance with Viking woman Maria Bonnevie, which is one of those “in crisis” situation romances and lacks not just romance but any sense of humanity. Bonnevie’s not bad but you’re never happy to see her because the scenes are just bad and are somehow worse than the bad A plot.

The A plot never delivers. How two directors, cinematographer Peter Menzies Jr., and editor John Wright managed to so completely fumble the action sequences—the Vikings hunting the monsters, the monsters hunting the Vikings—is inexplicable when you consider the professional pedigree and production budget. No one wanted to spend any time figuring out how to make this movie and instead they rely on slow motion a bunch of times. Including slowing down Kulich’s battle cries at one point, which is just cringe-inducing.

If they’d done in serious, it’d have had a chance. Not with this cast, obviously, but with a serious take and a better script. Or if they’d just done it exploitation-y, maybe they couldn’t gotten some energy. The movie’s not even boring as much as it’s exhausting. It’s exhausted, it’s exhausting.

No one looks as miserable to be participating as Diane Venora, who’s got the thankless role of being a recognizable female name for the opening titles and maybe even the poster but nothing else.

The 13th Warrior is a stunning waste of time for everyone involved, viewer included.

All Rise (2019) s01e17 – I Love You, You’re Perfect, I Think

Despite a forced start with Jessica Camacho and roomie and BFF Lindsay Mendez going hiking in some canyon before work and not finding a body, with some particularly forced angst from Camacho regarding boyfriend J. Alex Brinson declaring his love for her, the episode works out to be one of “All Rise”’s best.

Gregory Nelson’s script does a bit of a greatest hits tour through the show, making sure to give Simone Missick and Wilson Bethel banter and bickering banter to showcase the range of their characters’ relationship.

Nelson also takes the show seemingly new places—and revisiting some unfamiliar ones—the episode doesn’t just have a scene in the judges’ lounge, it also goes to the public defender office for the first time either ever or in a long while; the district attorney office is more familiar but rarely showcased as much as here. The show also figures out what to do with Audrey Corsa, now she and Brinson don’t seem to have a flirtation going. She’s a good sidekick for Bethel, who teaches her to be idealistic above all else in this episode.

Bethel’s got an innocent man to free, so lots of good white guy turmoil, while Missick’s got to deal with telling boss Marg Helgenberger what’s what as far as Helgenberger’s informal vetting.

The Missick and Helgenberger stuff turns out to be good, which is a surprise.

Then there’s a subplot with Peter MacNicol having to admit he’s capable of mistakes as an old white man, even means he has to respect young Latina women (in this case Mendez).

Paul McCrane (who does a fine job directing) is around a bit to spice things up.

Of course, the main plot is a soldier has PTSD so is he responsible for this assault, with Camacho as the defense attorney and Gavin Stenhouse as the accused. Stenhouse is pretty good. He’s able to make it work. Much better than when Camacho and Mendez have a really forced conversation about how much they support the troops.

Lots of big swings for the show—the PTSD of a soldier, Marg Helgenberger’s accountability arc, and the MacNichol having to admit his bias… and it does work out pretty darn well for the show. The episode successfully showcases the show at its best.

Hunters (2020) s01e09 – The Great Ole Nazi Cookout of ’77

“Hunters” must’ve had the same thought I did about hammering in the point “Operation Paperclip” was a real thing as this one starts with another of the show’s overly stylized, retro PSA videos. But it doesn’t need the history lesson for this episode, because this episode is where everything comes together. “Hunters” does the penultimate episode as a wrap-up, presumably so next episode can establish what the next season’s going to be like. A ground situation refresh. Love it.

And there’s a lot in the episode. A lot of it is even good. Jerrika Hinton having a showdown with Dylan Baker, then ending up dragging Baker along as a prisoner. It’s fantastic. All of a sudden Hinton comes to life again. She’s not moping about her love life, dying mom, uncaring dad, indifferent—at beast—colleagues (though Sam Daly appears again as her only office bud), or doing a purely expository investigation thing. She’s in a suspense thriller and she’s got to deal with Dylan Baker, who’s such a wonderful bastard.

There’s a good scene for Louis Ozawa, which is just an okay one for Tiffany Boone, but Ozawa gets some nice material this episode. Josh Radnor, it turns out, is able to make Kate Mulvany a lot more than she is on her own. It’s Radnor and Mulvany who find out the Nazis are going to execute their evil plan that night. No blackout from this one, however. Just a wanting John Woo movie.

It doesn’t start like a John Woo movie, it starts with Nelson McCormick almost able to direct an infiltration sequence. The team has come together. It’s time to stop the Nazis once and for all. Al Pacino’s going after Lena Olin and Logan Lerman wants to take out young Nazi Greg Austin, which leads to a painfully bad scene between Lerman and Austin. Lerman, doing his tough guy act this episode, is really not working out with this character development. He’s not able to do any of the stuff he needs to do. Meanwhile Austin’s able to weather the weirdest stuff in this episode and still get in some great deliveries.

But when it comes to action, McCormick certainly seems to be trying to do big action and he does it rather poorly. He’s seemingly confused, with the actors armed like it’s a John Woo movie, but the costumes still the seventies stuff, and the production values wanting. If they couldn’t do it, they shouldn’t have tried. “Hunters” has its definite moments, just rarely when it really needs them.

Like when the cliffhanger has Pacino once again acting like a complete idiot who’d never be able to track down and kill a single Nazi, much less a dozen of them or whatever. He’s always not thinking of something really obvious and important. It’s frustrating.

Hunters (2020) s01e07 – Shalom Motherf***er

“Hunters” and the secret history of July 13, 1977! It doesn’t just tie into an actual historical event, it causes an actual historical event. It also then directly ties into Summer of Sam then… I wonder if you could cut the entire movie into “Hunters” and just have it be a subplot.

The Nazis cause the New York City blackout of 1977. Maybe if the episode weren’t so wonky it’d be a better twist.

The whole episode’s not wonky, which is almost what makes it most frustrating. Yes, everything involving Pacino—who starts the episode deciding he’s going to keep more secrets from his team—and Jerrika Hinton (who knowingly lets the Nazis play her so she can close one or two open murder cases and not avert a terrorist attack) is wonky. The showdown between Pacino and Hinton is particularly bad because it’s unbelievable Pacino was able to mastermind anything. He gets painfully played in interrogation… and somehow never asks for a lawyer.

But Louis Ozawa finally gets a great moment or two, one with Josh Radnor (who’s so good) and another with Tiffany Boone (who still doesn’t get enough to do) and sort of assumes the unappreciated utility man position on the show. Radnor and Ozawa are trying to infiltrate a veteran’s hospital and Radnor mugs his way through a group therapy session talking to real vets like it’s a shitty war movie. It’s amazing stuff. Then Ozawa just tops it with his real sharing.

There’s a big suspense set piece with the team trying to avert the Nazi attack at Grand Central Station, which feels very New York movie, but then they’re laughably bad at tailing Greg Austin and it’s like… okay, the “Hunters” aren’t so much “Hunters” as bumblers at this point.

The episode ends on a very sad note–with another ghost coming in to forecast the tragedy—and it’s affecting as all hell, it’s just not particularly good. Pacino’s out of his depth, Hinton’s out of her depth… she’s continuing the U.S. Government protecting Nazis and he’s just so inept at masterminding what else would you expect from his team but disaster.

The show still works—it’s still got loads of accumulated goodwill (Dylan Baker’s amazing as always)—but it’d be nice if they could successfully execute this very important episode.