Did Spider-Man and the Hulk crossover a lot in their eighties cartoons? A few times, right? Because there must be some reason Bendis gives so much of this comic to the Hulk. Laziness is another possibility. Bendis has the ending he wants to do and he’s got to fill the pages until he gets there.…

So many pretty double-page spreads, so little story. Bendis has Nightmare–is that Dr. Strange’s villain’s name–torment Peter and the Hulk. There are like four pages wasted on the Hulk fighting off all these random people he killed. It’s not even his comic. Worse, there’s seemingly endless pages with Peter fighting off his villains, flashing back…

It’s another okay enough issue for a tie-in. Sort of. Bendis again hints at much, much better things if he weren’t being so darn cute with the plotting. He opens at the Bugle–or the Bugle’s emergency newsroom in New Jersey–and it’s a great scene. There’s some stuff with Ben Urich, then Jonah realizing he’s been…

It’s a fast-paced crossover mess of a comic book but it’s not terrible. Bendis gives May a couple good scenes–even though she’s sort of Gordon from Dark Knight Returns in how she’s saving people on the street. There’s a nice moment for Kitty, a hint of a nice moment for Gwen and Mary Jane. What’s…

Oh, come on, Bendis… good grief. So, Bendis finally gets around to giving Peter and Mary Jane an excellent circle of friends to hang out with–Kong, Kitty, Johnny, Gwen–and then it turns out the end is near because this issue is an Ultimatum tie-in. And there’s a great bit with Johnny crushing on Jessica Drew,…

It’s funny how Immonen isn’t very good at fight scenes. It’s like he gets bored with them too fast. Venom versus Carnage, Super Venom, boring. Aunt May pulling a gun on Eddie Brock–awesome. This issue finishes Bendis bringing Gwen Stacy back to life. Hopefully. She’s fine at the end of the issue, following an entirely…

Oh, come on, Bendis. If you can’t plot a full arc–even when you’re doing a bad one like this arc–don’t do a pad issue, just cut the number of issues down a little. Here’s what happens this issue. Eddie threatens Peter in the present. He wants the suit back–now, let’s not forget Bendis opened this…

Why is Bendis making this story arc so confusing? It’s giving me a little headache. So this issue ends with the Ultimates having the suit and Eddie Brock in the wind. It seems like Bendis has gotten to the present action of the the comic again. But he hasn’t, not unless he forgot about Eddie…

I’ll bet the flying guy is Ben Reilly. Maybe. It’d make sense, at least in Ultimate Spider-Man. Still not getting why Bendis thought he had a story here. Is it an adaptation of the video game or something else? I know the game’s in continuity so is it a sequel? An aside? Does it matter?…

Wait a second, is the the arc Bendis wrote to tie into the “Ultimate Spider-Man” video game? I thought he delayed it for years and years and then finally did it. He should have waited longer. So, Eddie Brock is gone as a narrator now, which makes no sense. Eddie’s narration last issue was the…

Oh, no, Bendis is going off the rails again. I thought last issue was a fluke, but now it’s a definite thing. This whole issue is Eddie Brock sitting at a park bench, telling people his story, then eating them. Bendis is demure about the eating thing until the last panel. Immonen does really good…

Bendis is really building up the Roxxon thing. Just on and on with Roxxon. I’m getting kind of sick of it. It’s his new Green Goblin. Well, maybe not, but kind of close. It’s way too convenient to have this evil company out there. Bendis is a writer who gets lazy easy and it’s just…

Except for the panel where Immonen draws Peter with so much of a girl face I thought Mary Jane and Kitty were friends–speaking of… I think Immonen even puts Peter in a Hello Kitty t-shirt–it’s a good issue. There’s some great comedy stuff with Flash protesting (without anyone accusing) he isn’t Spider-Man, then a joyous…

So the Blob is Liz Allen’s dad. There, I spoiled it for you. Now you won’t have Bendis’s sensational tacked on last page about it. Just a terrible, terrible page. But the rest of the comic is all right. He has a couple false endings, which are definitely annoying, but the whole “mutant hater” Liz…

I don’t think I’d ever realized how big Immonen makes Spider-Man’s eyes. It’s kind of annoying. Especially since this issue is a couple big talking heads scenes amid some superhero chase action. I guess no one wanted to bother with an Ultimate Angelica Jones so Bendis just turned Liz into Firestar. It’s a good issue–great…

Seriously, Kenny can’t get a kiss? He gets a hand squeeze from Kitty, but no kiss. Kid deserves some smooching. As I hoped, being rid of the Osborns has done nothing but help Bendis refocus his efforts. He opens the issue with one page internal monologues from Peter, Mary Jane, Kitty, Liz, Kenny and Johnny…

Wow. Bendis does half one of his big action issues with Norman going after Harry and there being a big Goblin battle. Peter and SHIELD are there too, with Peter jumping in and out of the action. There’s enough time for him to have a decent moment with Harry too. But then the issue changes…

Bendis continues his streak–two issues in a row at least–and Immonen is really settling in. There’s a lot of double page action spreads, lots of panels, with Kitty saving Peter from a fall with Norman. That sequence opens the issue and it’s fantastic. Even Bendis seems to get Kitty and Peter make a good superhero…

Peter’s not very smart this issue. I figured out mean old Ultimate Carol Danvers was using him as bait in the first scene. He needed for Kitty to rescue him and for Danvers to explain it all. Still, good enough issue. Kitty and Peter make a far more amusing superhero partners than they ever did…

As usual, Bendis redeems himself an issue later. He sticks to Peter–Norman doesn’t even get a live appearance; the villain turns out to be Electro (who seems real powerful in his Ultimate version). Sticking to Peter works wonders, as he gets to interact with both Mary Jane and May. Immonen is a slick artist, but…

Finally, the Norman Osborn narrated issue no one’s been waiting for…. Someone really should have told Bendis Ultimate Norman is not one of his finest creations, much less an interesting narrator. Especially not with Immonen on the art. Bagley always drew his stuff in some kind of a vacuum, like there wasn’t other modern comic…